How to take over the world

Those of you who have been with this blog for a while, or who have read a fair sampling of my earlier posts, may remember that there used to be a lot more variety here, back in the day. Besides tackling the bigwigs in the New-Wage biz, I had scads of posts about lesser luminaries and random loonies. There were many days when my blog just seemed to write itself.

A major reason for this bounty was that someone, somewhere, somehow had added my name to the database of a certain New-Wage email marketing service – a very active marketing service. As I've previously conjectured, perhaps someone thought the "Cosmic" in my handle was some indication that I would actually be a receptive audience for these marketing efforts.

No matter; not a week went by that I didn't receive numerous emails advertising various gurus, techniques, technologies, health supplements, books, DVDs, and so forth, not to mention more MLM schemes than you could shake a talking stick at. And the vast majority of it was, well, bat-s--t crazy (and so, for that matter, were the owners of the New-Wage marketing service). But all of it was rich, rich fodder, and like the proverbial lizard on a rock, lazily waiting for bugs to fly by, all I had to do to find material for my blog was just sit by the computer and wait for my "in box" to fill up.

Alas, at some point quite a while back, the light went out of my life. I stopped getting the emails. At first I thought the New-Wage marketing loons had gone out of business, and it made me a little sad, to tell the truth, but a perusal of their web site seemed to indicate that they were still active. "Ah, they finally got wise to me," I thought, not without a stab of regret. Perhaps, I thought, they had been getting complaints from some of their clients about whom I had snarked.

Although I never named my source, referring to it only as "my favorite New-Wage spam service," it's possible that my targets put two and two together, particularly since there weren't all that many New-Wage spam services regularly sending out the kind of stuff I was writing about. In fact, I remember my pal Steve Salerno of SHAMblog was on a radio show some time before the spam service pulled the plug on me, and one of the other guests on the show was a New-Wage ninny who had received my loving attention more than once, thanks to her emails I had received via the New-Wage spam express. I didn't catch the show, but afterward Steve told me she'd said something to the effect that she didn't mind critics, but she took offense at people like "that Cosmic Connie person" who just engage in random sniping.

In truth my sniping was only as random as the marketing campaigns of my targets, but I felt kind of honored when Steve told me that. I wasn't surprised, though. As it happens, more than one person has complained about what they feel is gratuitous sniping, though that's just the tip of the iceberg, complaint-wise. (I've also been called a pathetic little loser who creates nothing of value and is not even worth the effort it would take to counter my criticisms (although many have made that effort nonetheless). I've been called far worse things than a loser, including a word that rhymes with "runt." I've had people call me a Nazi and a hate-monger, and some have said they wish I would die a horrid death. And so forth.) It pretty much all slides off my back.

But I have to admit that my feelings were a little hurt to realize I may have been rejected by the New-Wage spam email people.

I let it go for quite a while, though, since I had a sizable backlog of urgent matters to blog about. Then finally at one point I tried to sign up to get back on the loony-tunes email list, but their web site wouldn't allow it. I tried under another name and email address, and then another,and I tried from different computers, but the site still wouldn't allow it. However, it seemed to be a malfunction on their end. Finally I gave up, resigning myself to having to make do with my other sources of inspiration. But I sure missed my New-Wage spam service.

And then the other night I was browsing around the Net and found a web site that is, in its own way, a source of looniness that is surely as richly loony as anything my old friends had to offer. The battiness showed up not as emails but as display ads on the web site for the radio show of one of my more 
famous snargets. I looked at some of those ads and felt as if I had come home.

The first one that caught my eye was undeniably hypnotic, as another one of my favorite snargets might say. It read: "HOW TO TAKE OVER THE WORLD. MAN'S MASTERS REVEALED. BUY THE BOOK NOW."

Excitedly I followed the link. [Update: The link no longer seems to work. So you'll just have to take my word for it. ~CC, March 2010] And what I found just blew me away. It was an ad for a book that promised to finally tell me what's really going on, who's really running the world, and how I can run the world myself, evidently replacing the nefarious forces that are in charge now. But I quickly learned this information wasn't for the faint of heart.

You must be warned however, that the information will rattle your current view on life. It isn't for the brainwashed imbeciles who the political giants sweep away with the wave of a hand. It isn't for those who whine, cry, and complain about their own circumstance. It isn't for people who expect to be saved by others. No, it is for those who are brave enough to swim in deep waters! For those open minded enough to challenge their own beliefs in search of the truth! For those who are tired of being dictated by external forces and wish to free themselves of the prison they are in! Yes, it will be tough for most to comprehend, but you have a choice. Either you continue your slumber, or you can choose to be awakened to the history of mankind that has been HIDDEN!

Look at your world. What do you see? A slave race. That's right, a heiarchy [sic] with a servant race. Human beings are programmed through a built-in slavery system to become workers for the rest of their lives. Human beings are an organic robotic race. They are not living free. They are living in a nightmare. They hate each other, fight wars, police one another, and use deception. You see, humans are being suppressed and it is breaking the limit. Life is not about working, it is about love.

And just to show how serious they are, the authors offer an excerpt from the book:

"How does one take the world? This question has been asked by many. You may be one of them. No, that doesn't make you bad, or guilty of anything except for asking the question. Most people at some time, or another have pondered about this. Many have tried! Throughout histroy [sic], there have been men and women who have fought and bled and sacrificed to accomplish this goal. Some have even come close! Go ahead, make a list of all the people you can think of who have tried to do it. Names like Napoleon, Stalin, Alexander The Great, The British Empire, Caesar, Hitler, and The Ancient Arab Kings may come to mind. Or characters from various fictional stories such as Star Wars, Superman, etc., fill that profile. However, they have all failed. You will learn from this book, WHY they all failed. Even those who have attained it were unable to sustain it. All of their glory was short lived. It's like an athlete doping himself up with hard core drugs to win the competition only to live a pityful [sic] existence after his glory days. This book is to educate you. Also, you will see how it is done correctly by those who have done it...and are continuing to do it."

However, I should warn you that their refund policy is not very liberal.

Warning: Due to the highly controversial nature of this book, no refunds are given. You are either ready for this, or not.

But hey, it's only $14.99 (marked down for Christmas from $29.99). And you'll get "12 Mini-Ebooks free on personal development!"

But wait, there's more! On the very same web site where I found the How To Take Over The World book, there was an ad for a site offering products that will help you survive whatever's coming. For example, here's one that tells you how to hoard food. And here's one that tells you exactly what to expect in 2012.

I bet that by now you are so excited you're about to wet your pants, if you're wearing pants. You are probably going to want me to reveal the site where I found these ads. Well, for only $500.00, I will tell you.

Okay, since it's almost the holidays, I'll give you a $500.00 discount.

So where did I see these marvelous loony ads?

Are you ready for the answer?

And do you like my short paragraphs?

Are they hypnotic?

Are you sure you don't want to give me $500.00 to tell you?

Well, it was worth a shot.

Okay. The site on which I saw the above ads is... The Kevin Trudeau Radio Network, or, as I now like to call it, Loony Central.

The Kevin Trudeau Radio Network site is a clearinghouse not only for political wingnutty stuff that would make Rush Limbaugh and FOX-TV proud, but also for healthnutty stuff – which is only fitting, since Kevin is a noted health expert – and, increasingly, New-Wage stuff. (Take a look at the banner ad that's currently on top of the page and you'll see what I mean, regarding the latter. The ad shows the mugs of Rev. Michael Beckwith and Dr. Wayne Dyer, and bears the tag line, "For health and happiness, you must be balanced!" And then look around at the other New-Wagey stuff on the site. This kind of invalidates some bloggers' longstanding observation that the New-Wage is inexorably bound to the liberal left. There doesn't seem to be much room for libs on Kevin's site, but there's plenty of room for New-Wage loons and hustledorks.)

Interestingly enough, two other ads in the section where I found the sites linked to above are the International Pool Tour and NaturalCures.com, which are Kevin's sites, so I wouldn't be surprised to learn that he also had some interest in the Take Over The World site, the Food Hoarding site, and the 2012 site. On the other hand, the latter three sites seem a tad unprofessional looking for a professional scammer of Kevin's caliber. So they probably aren't his. But the ads clearly have a place of honor as sponsors* of the Kevin Trudeau Radio Network, and I have no doubt that they are targeted to the same gullible audience Kevin targets.

As you may recall, I have paid homage to Kevin – who is more commonly known here as Kevin True-dough – on my Whirled previously, most notably in January of this year, and then again in July. It seems pretty obvious that all of the government's efforts to interfere with Kevin's livelihood have not stopped him. Although he is banned until 2011 from doing TV infomercials for his products, and has been fined out the kazoo by the government, he just keeps on keeping on. He just paid a visit to my home state this past weekend for some head-huddling with a few of his fellow entrepreneurs (Joe Vitale and Pat O'Bryan) in the little Hill Country town of Wimberley, Texas. (Pics and exclusive video interviews coming soon! Or, as one of the participants in the secret session wrote, "This is dynamite. You're not going to believe what you're seeing.")

So I'm sure we'll see some marvelous products and business ops coming out of that meeting. After all, Kevin may be banned from doing infomercials, but there's nothing to stop him from finding numerous other ways to extract money from the masses, particularly if he teams up with some in the New-Wage biz who are also experts in the Law of Extraction (as my friend Blair Warren once described on his late lamented Crooked Wisdom blog), and, most importantly, who have huge lists that Kevin wants to get his paws on.

Speaking of extraction, I also found something intriguing towards the very top of the pile of ads on Kevin's Radio Network site. This has to be the MLM scheme to end all MLM schemes. It's called the Global Information Network, or GIN for short. Actually it almost sounds as if whoever came up with this scheme either had a little too much gin themselves, or they're banking on the possibility that their marks will be a bit impaired.

What is GIN? According to the web site, it is "a Multi-Form Foundation organized in the country of Nevis." Nevis?!? Wow, if that doesn't have "in your face, U.S. Government!" written all over it, I don't know what does. But never mind that. One of the first things you learn is that GIN is a very, very, very, very exclusive network. It is also confidential. Don't believe me? Then take a look at this:

GIN provides its members with exclusive, confidential, never before released information regarding:

• Law of Attraction
• Money Making Opportunities
• Investing
• Worldwide Real Estate Opportunities
• Stocks, Bonds and Trading
• Commodities, Worldwide Currencies
• Off-shore Banking
• Asset Protection
• Natural Remedies and Cures for Illnesses
• And much more

So how do you join? Well, I'm sorry to tell you this, but membership is by invitation only. On the other hand, there is a publicly accessible page where you can apply for membership. On still another hand, you apparently have to have some kind of invitation code from an affiliate in order to complete the form.

Apply today for membership. Simply go to the Global Information Network website and click Join now. Fill out the short application.

Do it today..

Remember, you have been handpicked and hand selected to become a new member in the Global Information Network. You truly are special. Wealth can be yours. Emotional well being can be yours. Financial freedom is within your reach. Dynamic vibrant health and prosperity for you is now at hand.

Sign up today as a member of the Global Information Network and... May you never be the same.

The very fine print at the bottom says:

We are an informational organization. We are a "member sharing with other members" private association. We do not provide financial planning, tax, legal, investment, or medical advice. Consultation with independent expert advisors is strongly recommended. We are not a business opportunity.

Not a business opportunity, eh? And yet there is this page on how to make money with GIN, which says:

The first way to make money is to “sell” memberships in GIN. Another way of saying it is you “refer” people to join as members in GIN, or you “sponsor” people into GIN. All the terms are synonymous. The main issue here is that all commissions are based on the sale of a real product, which is a membership in the Global Information Network. Please refer to the GIN website and listen to the audio entitled “member benefits” describing GIN member benefits to see the amazing value of the product.

For everyone you get to join GIN as a member, or another way of saying it, for everyone you get to buy a membership in GIN, you are paid $200 commission. If you get just 5 people to join GIN as a member, you make $1000. That covers your initial membership dues. If you get 10 people to join GIN as a member, you make $2000. If you get 100 people to join GIN as a member you make $20,000. Anytime and every time you get someone to become a member in GIN you earn $200 commission. Because of the experts that are behind the GIN opportunity and their unparalleled successful track record generating over 100 Billion dollars in sales worldwide, we have insider marketing secrets using the internet and mass media marketing that can help you to potentially get many people to join as new GIN members. WE will provide you with all the secrets that can teach you how some members have signed up as many as 1000 new GIN members in just 60 days earning over $400,000 in just 60 days!

And yet, and yet...there's this, in small type at the bottom of the page:

Please note that all examples are for illustration purposes only. We make no income claims. Your income and success is solely based on your efforts, skills, market conditions, and a variety of factors. We do not promise nor claim you will make any money with this offer. Void where prohibited by law. Examples of past earnings do not guarantee future results. Individual results will vary. You could make more or less than discussed. Please review and fully understand the member agreement, terms and conditions, and affiliate agreement before joining. Never spend more money than you can afford to lose. All commissions are based on the sale of the product. The product is a GIN membership. You are not required to spend any money ever to join. There is no fee to join. You are not paid by recruiting people as affiliates. You are only paid commissions by selling memberships. You are not required to attend any meetings. You are not required to buy any sales or marketing tools. You are not, and never will be required to become a member in GIN. Based on a full legal review, we believe that this program complies with all laws where offered. Gin will comply with any and all changes in its affiliate commission marketing plan, that may be required from time to time as laws change where offered. Gin is not a business opportunity or franchise.

It's up to you to figure out what GIN (or "Gin," as it became towards the end of the copy) really is. But FYI, here's the link to the page explaining "Levels of Membership" (and the information on every level beyond Level 1 is "classified"). For even more insight, or perhaps just more confusion, here's a discussion about it on the Prison Planet forum. And really, you owe it to yourself to read this, for the laughs alone. Whether or not you can make mountains of money with GIN or Gin I can't tell you, but with Kevin Trudeau as one of your business partners, what can you lose?** So are you excited yet? Good, then go join GIN.*** Or go enjoy some gin. As for me, I'm just going to stay here and take over the world.

PS ~ The picture at the top has nothing to do with KT Radio Network or any of the ads I've found on that site so far. It is, very simply, a loving tribute to the owners of the New-Wage spam service I mentioned above. I was going to write another post on them to follow up my Ra Data post and my mention of them in the MystiCouples piece (second item down), but never got beyond this brief teaser. Someday, maybe.

PPS added 25 November: More on the exclusive Kevin True-dough video shot in Wimberley – something to whet your appetite (or perhaps ruin it).

PPPS ~ For more about True-dough's GIN scheme, see my December 4 post, "Illuminutty: the secret brotherhood of the chronically gullible."

* Here is a link to the complete list of "sponsors" of KT's radio show.

**Aside from your shirt.
*** I feel compelled to add this disclaimer, for the benefit of those who might have any doubt whatsoever: I do NOT recommend that you join GIN. I was being facetious. This is clearly another True-dough scheme in which, once again, he purports to offer some sort of forbidden knowledge that will transform your life and make you happy, healthy, wealthy, and wise. And it is my opinion that if he's bringing any of his New-Wage buds into this or any similar venture, you seriously need to hold on to your wallet.

* * * * *

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Russian to judgment?

Note: I've made some changes and additions to the "Anastasia" segment since I first published this post.
~CC, 24 September 2009
I've been doing a lot of soul-searching lately, and I have to own up to my tendency to be entirely too judgmental at times, in the sense that when I read about New-Wagers, I am entirely too willing to judge them for being a bit mental. I know I really need to be more open-minded about this stuff, especially since we're about to enter a new era of humankind and so forth, and some of the nutjobs visionaries I've snarked about could very well be the wayshowers who will lead us into the new era. I've been thinking more deeply* about these issues since I wrote my Russia-themed post the other day. Say what you will about Russia, in recent years there have been tons of remarkable things happening there, spirituality-wise. I mentioned some of these in passing in my previous post, and I've written about one of them extensively in a couple of other posts, but I think they all deserve a closer and more reverent look.**

"I smell dead people..."
Consider, for instance, Pyotr Kuznetzov, a former engineer who until fairly recently was the head of a dynamic though smallish underground movement, and when I say "underground," I mean it literally. Pyotr was able to persuade a group of about thirty-five souls, mostly women and a few children, to abandon their homes and most of their material possessions and, in November of 2007, to move into an underground cave about 600 kilometers (375 miles) southeast of Moscow. Actually it was a tunnel, complete with bedrooms and a ventilation system, that Pyotr designed and constructed under the roots of a tree.

Why would he do such a thing? It was that menacing Apocalypse, you see, which Pyotr informed his disciples was set to occur in May of 2008, at which time the Devil would finally get his due. The alarming thing, according to Pyotr, was that in the months leading up to the big event, the human race was going to be overtaken by waves of cannibalism and a desire to have frequent sex, though he didn't say how or if these two phenomena would intersect. Pyotr told his followers that they'd better get themselves underground to avoid those horrors. And so they did, proclaiming themselves to be the True Russian Orthodox Church. They apparently lived mainly on honey and jam, and were forbidden to watch TV, which probably didn't matter so much, considering that the reception down there might not be so great anyway. They were also forbidden to listen to the radio or handle money, and plastic was verboten as well; Church members believed, as did their leader, that credit cards and the bar codes on food packaging were Satanic. (In regard to credit cards, I have to say that I can almost see their point.)

Interestingly enough, Pyotr, or Father Pyotr, as he was known to his followers, did not join them underground. My first thought when I read this was that he stayed on the surface so he could minister to some of those sex-mad women who would be swarming the streets on their way to the Apocalypse – a ministry that was certainly a noble calling, and someone had to have the courage to do it. But that is just wild speculation on my part, and you know how unreliable I can be. Others have speculated that, being a structural engineer by training, Father Pyotr was aware that a cave built under the roots of a tree might not be the most structurally sound place to be. But Pyotr merely said that God had given him "different tasks." At any rate, the Russian authorities, as well as friends and relatives of the cave dwellers, and even a Russian priest who specialized in the Apocalypse, repeatedly tried to get Pyotr's disciples to come out of the cave. But their efforts were met with gunshots, and the cave people threatened to blow themselves up. Now, we know how that would have ended if this had happened in the United States, but the Russian authorities chose to just let them be, more or less, though they didn't give up in their efforts to persuade them to resurface or, lacking that, at least to let the little children go. For their part, and despite being called "cult members," the cave dwellers considered themselves to be Orthodox Christians who were simply saving themselves from the evils that were to come to all who remained on the surface.

The weather grew colder, but the hardy followers braved the bitter winter. The following spring, however, as the snows began to melt, the roof of the True Russian Orthodox Church people's underground world started to cave in, as local geologists had been warning it would probably do. This frightened some of the cave dwellers enough to convince them to emerge from their shelter. Pyotr was apparently upset that his Church was falling apart (literally) and his vision sullied, and, more importantly, that the Apocalypse was not coming to pass as he had predicted it would. Even the boldest leaders sometimes have moments of agonizing self-doubt and true dark nights of the soul, and Father Pyotr was no exception. It seems he attempted suicide by repeatedly hitting himself on the head with a log after his followers began coming to the surface. Other reports said he was attacked by some female cult members who hit him with a log. What seems clear is that he had an unfortunate run-in with a log, and ended up in the hospital as a result. No one ever said that being a visionary spiritual leader is easy.

The Russian authorities and numerous friends and relatives of the cave people continued in their efforts to get them all to come out. Finally, in mid-May of 2008, the authorities, friends, and relatives got their wish as the remaining members of the True Russian Orthodox Church returned to the surface. Apparently, however, it wasn't because the Church members were disillusioned by the realization that May was halfway over and there were indications that their leader had, after all, been wrong. No, they left because the stench of two of their cave mates who had died a while back – one from severe fasting for Lent, and the other from cancer – finally became unbearable. So bad was the smell that it was even noticeable above ground, so you can imagine how it must have been to the cave dwellers. And so, six months after they had descended, the last keepers of Pyotr's bold vision broke the faith and came out of their hiding place.

As for poor Father Pyotr, he was declared to be suffering from schizophrenia and was held in a psychiatric hospital for treatment. Isn't that often the case with visionary leaders? Sigh...the secular world just does not understand.

Rus' Resurrecting: Putin a new face on worshipWhile it seems that the era of Father Pyotr's True Russian Orthodox Church has passed (although I don't think we should take anything for granted, given the general spiritual milieu in Mother Russia), other mystical movements are alive and well in that strange and vast land of ice and fire. For one group, Russia's former president and current Prime Minister, Vladimir Putin, is The Chosen One. The Putin worshipers perform daily devotions to a "Presidential icon" (or would it now be a "Prime Ministerial icon?") that mysteriously appeared to them one day. They believe that Putin is the reincarnation of both the Apostle Paul and King Solomon.

The "Mother Superior" of the sect is Svetlana Frolova, aka "Mother Photinia," who says that she and her followers didn't choose Putin; God did. When Boris Yeltsin named Putin as his successor, Mother Photinia's soul just exploded with joy. And the rest is history, or heresy, depending upon your point of view.

As for Mother Photinia, she apparently did some prison time for fraud back in the 1990s. But that was then, and this is now. I'm sure that serial scammer health and nutrition crusader Kevin Trudeau could tell you that a little bit of time in the pen is utterly irrelevant when it comes to spreading The Truth.

In the Year of Our Lord, 49...Though my Jewish friends currently observing Rosh Hashanah are welcoming in the year 5770, and it is 2009 according to the Gregorian calendar, for a growing group of devotees in Russia it is only the year 49. That is because their leader, an ex-cop named Sergei Torop, now known as Vissarion, has convinced thousands of people that he is Jesus H. Christ Himself. And for followers of this Jesus of Siberia, this Messiah of the Steppes, time is measured by the life of Vissarion.

He says he realised that God had sent him to Earth to teach mankind about the evils of war and the havoc we were wreaking on the environment.
With Christmas abolished his followers mark the day of his first sermon on August 18 as their special feast day.
Time in the community is measured by Vissarion’s life and so as he is 48 years old his Church is now living in year 49.
His followers, who have given up their lives to follow him, are strict vegans and are banned from smoking and drinking or handling money.
Around 300 of them live in wooden huts in the village that has grown up around his church and which does not appear on any maps.
Many thousands more have made their homes in the small villages that surround Petropavlovka and survive the vicious Siberian winters so that they can be close to their Messiah.

Hmmm....banned from handling money.... shades of Pater Pyotr?
For Russians to whom Vissarion doesn't appeal, there are many more Jesuses to choose from, as blogger Andy Hume writes on Jewcy.com.
(Is it just me, or does the old woman in the pic above bear a remarkable resemblance to Monty Python's Eric Idle?)

Anastasia: real because thousands say she is
"In general, it is impossible to stop the Ringing Cedars movement, just as it is impossible to stop the sun from rising, as it is impossible to stop the moon from rising. But it's possible to fight the movement, to slander it, to speak badly of it, cast suspicion on it. And perhaps there are some forces that somehow, for some reason, are acting in this way."
~ Vladimir Megré, perpetrator of the Anastasia/Ringing Cedars phenomenon

Finally, when I'm wrong, Dear Ones, I'm not afraid to admit it, and I was wrong, wrong, wrong when I suggested, back in April of 2007, that in order to get the greatest mileage out of his New-Wage scheme, Russian entrepreneur Vladimir Megré should have invented a disembodied or Ascended imaginary friend (a la Abraham-Hicks) rather than a supposedly living one like Anastasia. I speculated that hordes of folks would be traveling to the remote Russian forest where Megré's lovely blonde babe is allegedly holed up, in order to see for themselves if she really exists. I imagined that Vlad might eventually have some serious credibility issues because he gave too many details about Anastasia, details that, in theory, could be subject to intense scrutiny. 

Well, I was wrong, at least regarding my speculation that credibility issues would be in any way deleterious to the Anastasia myth. The truth about Anastasia's existence is this: It. Does. Not. Matter. Whether she literally "exists" or not is completely irrelevant, because the Anastasia movement, originally inspired by Megré's series of books on the flaxen-haired recluse, has torn like a wildfire across Russia, some parts of Europe and, more recently, North America as well. Vlad's made-up gal pal has become not only the basis for a growing sustainable-living movement, but also for a bona fide religion, complete with rituals and practices, such as, in some cases, smearing oneself with mud, to symbolize the sanctity of Mother Earth. Part New-Age, part environmentalist, the Ansastasian movement is kind of like the Findhorn movement (which originated in Scotland), but it seems to be growing much more rapidly. It has even made its mark on Russian politics.

Stateside, devotees in Ashland, Oregon and Mt. Shasta, California have been busily engaged for the past couple of years in setting up an Anastasia-inspired eco-village (or Kin's Domain, in Anastasian parlance). The challenges in the beginning were daunting:

Here in Oregon we are working on a plan to create a Kin’s Domain on several hundred acres of land. The logistical challenges around doing this are extraordinary, but by the grace of Anastasia we will succeed! Some of the biggest challenges seems to be dealing with local and state zoning ordinances, urban growth boundries [sic] and money.

"By the grace of Anastasia"?!? See what I mean about the religion bit?
Logistics aside, nothing can stop a movement whose time has come, and in September of 2007, one of the leaders of the project wrote:

The wave has finally hit Ashland. The hundreth monkey has been realized here. After our meeting last night and the inspiration and information that was downloaded I am now confident that everyone in Ashland / Mt. Shasta will know about Anastasia. Our work has shifted to a new gear now and we can start to focus more energy onto implementing her ideas.

On 15 May, 2008, there came this "breaking news" (all-caps theirs):

THE ANASTASIA ECO-SETTLEMENT PROJECT HAS FOUND ITS HOME IN NORTH AMERICA ON SACRED MOTHERLAND!!! MANY GREAT THANKS TO ALL OF YOU WHO CONTRIBUTED TO THIS SUCCESS AND TO MANY WHO HAVE SUPPORTED THIS DREAM AND VISION WITH YOUR LOVE FROM NEAR & FAR. SHAMBHALA-SHASTA COMMUNITY HAS TAKEN BACK 466 ACRES OF PRISTINE MOTHERLAND. FREE AND CLEAR. NO DEBT. NO ENCUMBRANCES. NO LIENS. FREE AND CLEAR!!!

In case you're interested in joining the community, here's their Settler Sign-up Form. 

I have to tell you that some things have shifted a bit since I first reported about 'Stasia and Vlad in Spring of 2007. F'rinstance, in my zeal to appeal to the lowest common denominator, I made a big deal out of Anastasia being nude or nearly nude. And, indeed, she was portrayed as a scantily dressed nymphet on the rather cheesy covers of the original English-language editions of the books. Now, however, the nekkid bit is being de-emphasized. And the books have been given more modern-looking, artsy covers, apparently in an effort to appeal to a broader market, make the books look less like either children's books or fantasy novels, and avoid offending the easily offended – although nudity does not seem to be the main offensive factor, judging from the way it was 'splained on the FAQ page of the Ringing Cedars Books web site:

Why did the publisher change the covers?

The first edition covers were not commissioned works. The artist (an entomologist specializing in the study of butterflies) was inspired to produce these images after reading the books in Russian. The publisher—Dr Leonid Sharashkin—selected these images for their authenticity of feeling—especially the artist's obvious reverence for Nature.
Many people judge a book by its cover. Many have judged these to be children's books or fantasy novels. The image of a "white" woman in a short dress was found to be offensive to some nationalities. Major international wholesalers said they would not distribute books with such covers because the "Russian look and feel" suggested a story not necessarily appealing or applicable to Western readers. The list goes on…
In summary, since the books contain such important and valuable information, relevant to readers everywhere in the world, the publisher has released the second revised edition in "new clothes", with the hope that many more people will be able to enjoy these books.

Regarding Ana's alleged nekkidity, even Mt. Shasta Anastasians seem drawn to the more modestly attired "Anastasia in a dress," who looks for all the world like a chaste teenager on her way to the local Renaissance Festival.
But, getting back to the original issue: even though it really doesn't matter (and, many would argue, shouldn't matter) whether or not Anastasia is "real," her existence apparently remains a matter of concern for some. This is so despite the clear implication, in this copy from the Ringing Cedars Press web site, that more than one other person has actually seen her:

She consistently displays the most developed psychic and mental powers including remote viewing and healing, mind reading and seemingly perfect memory. When challenged to solve some of society's most complex social, health and environmental problems, after only a few minutes lying on her back on the ground, with eyes closed and just her fingertips twitching, she has provided answers in such incredible detail, that witnesses have been left flabbergasted.
She says these powers are natural to Mankind and in these books she describes exactly how they may be regained by any one of us.

Granted, the copy doesn't specify exactly who the flabbergasted witnesses are, but I am sure they are very reliable, or they wouldn't be mentioned on the Ringing Cedars Press web site. For those who still might be in doubt, Dr. Leonid Sharaskin, aka "Dr. Leo," Vlad Megré's translator and the founder of Ringing Cedars Press, conducts $300.00 workshops in which, among other things, he discusses the matter of Anastasia's existence:

Session 8. The Return of Anastasia

• This is Dr. Leonid Sharashkin's awe–instilling one–and–a–half–hour–long answer to the question as to whether Anastasia really exists.
• Learn from Leonid's years of scrupulous scholarly research of the Anastasia phenomenon and expand your understanding of who she is well beyond anything you can read in the Ringing Cedars books.

You might be wondering why it takes a whole hour and a half for Dr. Leo to answer a simple question. I wondered the same thing. But maybe it's a far more complicated matter than our puny and limited consciousnesses are able to fathom.
In an article published in 2005 (a few years before the Anastasian eco-villages had caught the fancy of some Russian politicos), Megré attempted to 'splain why Anastasia hadn't proven her existence by, for example, appearing on television. "What TV station would be willing to give her air time?" he asks, by way of explanation. And he answers his own question:

Not one, I can assure you. You can try to speak with the television networks yourselves. Another question: Would you want to watch Anastasia's appearances mixed in with commercials for diapers, orbits, and beer?

Would the networks allow Anastasia to speak if she would say that the products being advertised are harmful to people?

What do you think the reviews of Anastasia's appearance would be like? Judging by the organized persecution that occurs in the press, it is clear what they would be.

Vlad also wrote that after two of the Anastasia books had been written, various female preachers emerged and claimed to be Anastasia. At least one was bad-mouthing him, claiming that Vlad had stolen her thoughts and was now writing books based on her ideas. The nerve of some people. Anyway, if you still harbor doubts of your own about whether or not Anastasia is real, you simply must read Vlad's article, which will erase your doubts entirely.
Or maybe it won't. In fact, I am sorry to tell you that even some passionate fans of the Anastasia books question whether the books are fiction or nonfiction. For example, take a look at this discussion on the Ringing Cedars forum. The person initiating the thread was feeling duped after reading a December 2007 interview in which Megré seemed to be explaining the real inspiration for his Anastasia fantasy.

MEGRE: I used to be a businessman. In general, I'm like that by nature. Then I had the good fortune to meet people like Agafia Lykova, who live in the taiga, far from any cities. Agafia herself was taken by force from her squatter's holding. She became ill. And went back. Where she continues to live peacefully. People like this interested me very much. But I noticed that everyone, including Vasiliy Peskov, wrote about the difficulties of their way of life. I, on the other hand, decided to write about their philosophy. This excited me so much that I gave up my entire business. I sat down for a year and wrote Anastasia.

Another participant had this to say to the disillusioned originator of the thread:

As if she is real or not we will probably never know. Even if it was all made up you need to ask yourself why you would be so upset if it was just a story. Granted no one likes to be told they are reading a true story only to find out later it was all made up. But if for any reason's [sic] it does upset you, you really need to ask yourself why? What was it from the story you needed to be true? Why would you put a story, real or unreal, ahead of yourself?

I would comment on that comment, but I think it pretty much speaks for itself. At any rate, the participants seem to be fairly evenly divided between believing Anastasia is real and thinking she may be a figment of Vlad's imagination. Several, however, say that they don't care either way, because they enjoy the books anyway and believe in the ideals discussed therein.*** It kind of reminds me of the endless arguments among fans of pop singer Clay Aiken before and after he officially came out and admitted he is gay. Before his self-outing, opinions on the fan boards were divided among those who thought he might be gay; those who indignantly insisted he isn't (because he's a good Christian, and besides, on numerous occasions he publicly SAID he's not gay); and those who said they didn't care either way because Clay is such a talented and good person who truly wants to make a difference. After he finally admitted his gayness to People Magazine, fans were divided between those who were outraged and grievously disappointed, and those who said they didn't care either way because Clay is such a talented and good person who truly wants to make a difference. But I digress.

For those who remain curious about Vlad Megré himself, good luck finding anything substantial about his earlier life, of which "little is known," as they say, leading one to wonder if even Vlad himself is ignorant of his past. There are, however, several lengthy "interviews" with Megré in which he expresses his thoughts on the Anastasia phenomenon and on his own troubles with detractors. Actually, these "interviews" are conversations between Megré and one of his admirers, psychotherapist/physical therapist/"Master Executive Coach" Regina Jensen, Ph.D. It appears that all of these exchanges were expressly produced for Ringing Cedars' online publication, The EARTH Newspaper, which means, of course, that they are an unimpeachable source of truth. (If the language sounds a bit stilted and awkward in places, that is no doubt due to the fact that it is a translation; Vlad, we're told, only speaks and reads Russian.)

Among other issues, Vlad and Regina discussed the Big One, Anastasia's existence, in a conversation that took place at a Ringing Cedars conference in Turkey in 2008. You can see how Regina is enabling Vlad's perpetuation of the Anastasia fantasy...er...I mean, how she is helping Vlad clarify his policies regarding Anastasia:

Regina Jensen: Vladimir Nikolayevich, I personally hope that Anastasia does not make herself available to the curious public any more than she already has. Carl Gustav Jung, a celebrated author, analyst and psychologist said a long time ago that "people can die from mass-projection," such as people of great fame who are exposed to the masses of images which others project upon them day and night. While Anastasia, more than anyone on this planet, can protect herself from such onslaughts very well, don't you agree we need not burden her any more than we already have with unnecessary demands?
Vladimir Megre: I don't think she is afraid of these onslaughts, after all, she herself said, "Evil of the world, leave your works, rush to me, try, I am alone before you, conquer for the sake of conquering, everyone fall on me, there will be battles without battles," and so on, and so forth. She is not afraid of this.
As far as "making herself available" goes, I think that it is impossible for her to make herself available to the public more than she already has. Judge for yourself, a person emerges onto the public stage and says, "Look, it's me." He stands before the people, everyone looks at him. "So you've emerged, you're standing here, and now what?" People see some person in front of them, they don't know his thoughts, what his personality is like, what he has on his mind, what he has planned, they see only the body before them! What does this give them? Nothing, of course.
Here in Europe, Canada, America, Russia, the countries of the CIS, the Baltic states, and Israel, so many different people all around the world have begun to understand each other without knowing each other's language only by saying the word "Anastasia." She is not making herself available, she has not become a "goddess" - she has become a friend, simply a friend.
So, how much more can she really make herself available? Come out of the kitchen peeling potatoes? Or emerge in such a way that everything around her is illuminated by her radiant thought? I believe that she has made herself available. And what's more, I believe that she will make herself available to each man, but in the image of the woman he loves. And that will really be a masterful entrance!

One point brought out in another 2008 conversation between Vlad and Dr. Jensen is that in the years since the Anastasia books emerged on the scene and started getting more popular, Vlad has had his share of detractors and people who spread awful rumors about him (including, I suppose, those renegade female preachers mentioned above). As he tells Dr. Jensen:

Negative rumors have been circulating about me for as long as ten years. In all this, the mass media have been exploited in the most active manner. I live in Russia. Once, when I was sitting in my garden beneath an apple tree and working on my next book, a neighbor comes up to me in the garden with a newspaper in his hands and says, "Vladimir, you're sitting here, but the newspaper writes that you live in an Egyptian palace surrounded by Mafia gunmen and that you operate a totalitarian sect, and the readers of your books are going out of their minds."
I didn't have to explain anything to my neighbor, he saw with his own eyes that the newspaper was printing a lie. But after only several days, this same article was reprinted by a number of newspapers, including one Canadian newspaper. The Russian District Court told my lawyers that the newspaper had said nothing insulting, the journalist had simply expressed his opinion, and he had the right to do so. But this journalist had not even met with me. The editor of the Canadian newspaper, after Canadian readers appealed to him, and without the intervention of a court, made public apologies.****
Regarding the sharing of this special material, there seems to be an overt, concerted effort not to permit society to discuss the ideas and suggestions set out in the books regarding modern man's urgent need to improve their way of living. The libelous publications never earnestly discuss the issues raised in the books, but speak in uninformed generalities and degrading terms about me and my readers.

Dr. Jensen and Vlad both go on to say that the criticism is the result of people in power not wanting the rest of us to know the truth. Vlad explains to Dr. Jensen:

... the spreading of all sorts of rumors about me are ultimately futile subterfuges to distract people away from the main issues at hand. Moreover even in the first book I disclosed about myself that I am not a saint, that I drank, smoked, flirted with women, and was involved in business. But now I don't. Yes, the blood of the businessman can still begin to rush, only now it is not like before. I am very proud that, with the help of my daughter and son-in-law, I have been able to set up the production of cedar oil according to Anastasia's technology. And I think there are not many products in the world equal to it.
For a long time I was unable to bring it up to the quality of Anastasia's oil, even though the modern technology of a medicinal compounds plant was used. But it soon became clear that it was impossible to obtain the required quality in the city, and it then became necessary to transfer the production to a village in the taiga 100 km from the city...and it worked out. With regard to Anastasia, she is always with me, in my heart, in my soul.

And for untold numbers of passionate devotees, Anastasia's presence in Vlad's heart and soul, not to mention in the pages of his books, is more than enough. I would say that this is pretty darned impressive for what started out as little more than a middle-aged man's wet dream.

* * * * *

Well, Dear Ones, I hope you've enjoyed our Whirledwind tour of Russian mysticism. I know I have, and I know too that I shouldn't have been so snide in writing about Russia the other day, seeing as how the place is so obviously a center of open-minded, openhearted spirituality. Once again I find myself wading in my shallow pool of snark, my tiny voice all but drowned out by the roar of the waves on the deep and endless ocean of outrageous gullibility passionate belief. And in the wake of this stunning realization, I am left, not for the first time, with but one thought: I've gotta find me a scam.

* "Deep" in the sense of my usual profoundly shallow mulling on these matters.
** Okay, so I managed the "closer" look, but you will, I fear, have to search elsewhere for "more reverent." One out of two ain't bad, though.
*** Regarding the fiction v. nonfiction issue, it's also noteworthy that James Redfield's very clumsily written but wildly successful 1993 spiritual novel, The Celestine Prophecy, was marketed from the beginning as fiction. Redfield never claimed it was anything but fiction. Granted, the cover of the trade edition was kind of cagey, bearing the tag line, "An adventure," rather than "A novel." And the blurb above the title was similarly ambiguous. The fact that the story was framed in nine supposedly profound "insights" about life also may have led many readers to treat it as nonfiction. But the cover blurbs were created by the publisher; Redfield himself was pretty straightforward about Celestine being a work of fiction, albeit fiction with a message. In any case, the New-Agey concepts and principles discovered and discussed by the characters in the novel struck a deep and resonant chord in thousands of readers, and The Celestine Prophecy became a major bestseller, spawning a sequel, numerous auxiliary materials, and hundreds of workshops, study groups, meet-ups, and so on (and even, in 2006, a bad movie). A generation before Redfield, Carlos Castaneda captivated spiritual hipsters and even some academicians with his Don Juan wisdom books, which were originally marketed as nonfiction but later revealed to be mostly fiction – not that it mattered to those who believed Castaneda's books contained profound truths. My point is that the categories of "fiction" and "nonfiction" are all but irrelevant when people are so desperately hungry for what they believe to be Greater Truths.
**** Vlad doesn't specify which Canadian newspaper published the original "lies" about him and subsequently made the apologies, nor does he specify how they apologized, and I can't seem to find anything else on the Internet about it. But I'm sure that Vlad wouldn't lie to us. I suppose that like Anastasia's existence, the bit about the Canadian newspaper is just something we'll have to accept on faith.

* * * * *

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Another hustledork moviemercial comin' your way

Just in case you haven't yet had your fill of New-Wage moviemercials, you will be thrilled to know that there are more on the horizon. For example, there is Awakeners, which promises to be yet another hustledork showcase, thinly disguised as an exercise in "conscious filmmaking." Expected release date is some time in early 2009.

Not to be confused with Sheri S. Tepper's fantasy/sci-fi series, The Awakeners, this Awakeners, it appears, will have a corny story line, a la What The Bleep. The tale revolves around a woman going through an awakening process and checking into some "spiritual halfway house" where she and other evolved-beings-in-progress can really start evolving. A site I found 'splains it:

Together, they are assisted by 'the other side' in awakening their latent powers. To some, they appear to be lunatics, and to others, wise sages. But through their journeys, they all discover their awakened purpose in assisting humanity through the emerging paradigm shift.

I imagine the filmmakers will find ways to work various talking heads into the plot line. This promises to be really good, particularly if the hustledorks are actually given character roles instead of just talking-head parts. I can't wait.

And there's great news for you marketers who were looking for a handy name for the burgeoning demographic that includes many hustledork-movie fans. They are officially called the "lifestyle of health and sustainability," or "LOHAS" market. (This is not to be confused with the "lifestyle of hedonism and nitwittery," or "LOHAN" market.) LOHAS was mentioned in this blurb about the executive producer of The Awakeners:

Audra Kelly, Awakeners executive producer, exudes a profound and rare commitment to the success of Awakeners in local, national, and international markets. She believes that much is at stake in divisive media and expresses the urgency of delivering a unification of humanity through inspiring films. Audra is not alone in this belief, as 19 percent of adults in the United States have been identified as belonging to the lifestyle of health and sustainability (LOHAS) market, members of which value the mind-body-spirit connection and carry the ultimate purpose of reaching their full human potential...This growing population longs for films such as Awakeners to hit the movie theaters. People are asking for a shift toward conscious filmmaking, which indicates that consciousness-raising films may soon dominate the industry. Audra’s vision is that Awakeners will kick-start this trend, reaching blockbuster status by resonating in the hearts of its viewers.

As it happens, and as my pal Chris Locke at the Mystic B blog reminded me (he had previously told me about this but I'd forgotten it), LOHAS is also the official name of a Colorado-based organization that publishes a slick magazine and has its home on the Web at http://www.lohas.com/:

LOHAS companies practice "responsible capitalism" by providing goods and services using economic and environmentally sustainable business practices. LOHAS business owners and industry leaders from around the world meet each year at the LOHAS Conference to discuss industry trends, share ideas and learn how to run a successful LOHAS business.

LOHAS consumers, sometimes referred to as Lohasians, are interested in products covering a range of market sectors and sub-sectors, including: Green building supplies, socially responsible investing and "green stocks", alternative healthcare, organic clothing and food, personal development media, yoga and other fitness products, eco-tourism and more.

Now, don't get me wrong. I'm all for sustainability and progressive business models that take into account that we're living on a fragile planet of finite resources. Actually, the planet isn't all that fragile (as the late George Carlin famously noted), but we are, and we seriously need to stop soiling our nest. My problem with the whole "sustainability" thang is that it almost always comes packaged with a cloying and annoying, although eminently blogworthy, SNAG* mindset.

Chris reminded me that LOHAS had their annual pow-wow in his hometown of Boulder this past summer, an event that, as he put it, "you can see documented in all its perverse glory" in the video on their site (here's the link again). "It's all just soooo Boulder," he wrote.

And if you want something that is not only soooo Boulder but also soooo SNAG-gy, give thanks unto Chris for pointing me in the direction of a guided meditation at the 2008 LOHAS event, led by Max Simon, son of Deepak Chopra's sidekick David Simon. Simon the Younger is Chief Enlightenment Officer of GetSelfCentere.com, which offers something called "Self-Centered Meditation." As Chris noted, you really could not make this stuff up.

So, are ya ready to meditate with the Lohasians? Well, then, here's the meditation. Strip naked if you need to, and try not to picture some of those Lohasians doing the same.

PS ~ Hey, and speaking of hustledork moviemercials, we have an official world premiere date for Beyond The Secret, which seems to be primarily "Scientist Bob" Proctor's brain child (I snarked a bit about it back in August; scroll down to "Scientist Bob is at it again!"). The link I provided on my post still works, but the page has changed; even so, the "movie" that's premiering in January of 2009 is clearly part of the same project I wrote about. Equally clearly, it is one of Scientist Bob's moneymaking (for him) schemes.

PPS ~ This doesn't have anything (directly) to do with hustledork movies, but the other day I promised a Twitter pal, Christopher Jorgensen – creator of the delightful Jackass Letters site – that in my next blog post I would mention a letter he wrote to someone I snarked about on my blog a couple of years ago. Whereas I generally just snark about people, Christopher, in the fine tradition of people such as Don Novello, aka Lazlo Toth, prefers to engage them directly. The guy he wrote to isn't a hustledork so much as he is a lovable kook: Lightworker/Spirit Master Gary Johnson, whom I blogged about in November of 2006.

Here's the letter, and the Lightworker's reply. Enjoy!

* SNAG: Sensitive New Age Guy (or Gal)

Watch out for flying debris...

Here are some more bits of space(y) debris currently orbiting around my Whirled…

Another branch of the "Not-see" Party
I owe the above pun to the great Swami Beyondananda, aka Steve Bhaerman, who hangs with the enlightened crowd but doesn’t make a big sanctimonious deal about it. I love this guy because he is a more prolific punster than I’ll ever be; I can only aspire to his level of greatness, pun-wise. (I have a feeling that if I did actually reach that level, the Rev, no huge fan of puns, would leave me for sure.) Anyway, if you follow the link above and read Swami/Steve’s article, you’ll see that it’s pretty much an indictment of the current U.S. presidential administration. I’m definitely no fan of Dubya, but I submit that there are other menacing "Not-see" factions as well – not only on the other side of the political aisle from Dubya and friends, but throughout U.S. culture and in other parts of the world.

Parts of the world such as Germany, f'rinstance, where American filmmaker David Lynch recently stood before a crowd in Berlin along with the self-styled "Raja of Germany," Emanuel Schiffgens.*

Lynch is currently touring Europe to open a series of "invincible universities" to teach the philosophy of Transcendental Meditation, or TM, with the purpose being to engender world peace. Lynch and Schiffgens are both followers of the Maharishi Mahesh Yogi, who founded the concept of TM. Schiffgens is Lynch’s partner for establishing the Invincible U in Berlin. The plan is to recruit 1,000 students at $2,500.00 a pop, apparently to learn peacemaking TM-style, as well as yogic flying.

At one point, Schiffgens declared, "Invincible Germany! Invincible Germany! I want to hear you all say, invincible Germany!"

The audience in Berlin's Urania Theater was having none of this. "That's what Hitler wanted!" shouted one man.

Schiffgens' response? "Yes, but unfortunately he didn't succeed."

Here’s the link to a video of the Raja and the Lynch-man. Prepare to be amused and yet at the same time slightly horrified.

As you may be aware, I am not the first person to jump on this story. Jody at Guruphilac beat me to it by a couple of days, as did numerous other bloggers, and Time Magazine as well, not to mention Spiegel Online. But if you want to get right down to it, the person who beat us all to the punch regarding certain New-Wage/fascist connections is Chris Locke, creator of the Mystic Bourgeoisie blog. And I think we all owe it to ourselves to examine the historical connections Chris has taken such pains to write about. (This is not to say that everyone who embraces any kind of New-Wage/new-age idea or spiritual path is a Nazi or a fascist or a potential architect of the next Holocaust. Still, there is that history thing... not to mention the varieties of elitism among some New-Wagers, including some who seem to believe they, or their children anyway, are part of a new superior breed of human beings…)

But back to the Lynch mob. Although a bit scary, that video of Lynch and the Raja is also encouraging, because these clowns were getting heckled, laughed at, challenged, and jeered at by the German audience. Wouldn’t you love to see that happen at one of those SHAM/selfish-help/New-Wage dog-and-pony shows Stateside?

[Added on Sunday, November 18:] By the way, on one of the Maharishi's sites, Global Good News, the page on Germany has listed the "Invincible Germany" project as one of the Maharishi's successes. However, that page hasn't been updated in a while...

Bad Science, good writing
My new friend Gregory, who’s been commenting on this blog of late, sent me a link to a recent article by a British physician named Dr. Ben Goldacre, creator of the Bad Science web site. Dr. Goldacre’s article discusses what’s wrong with homeopathy. I’m not out to pick on homeopathy, particularly since several people I respect have reported good results with some homeopathic remedies. But I'm still reeling a bit from watching the video of the homeopathy "lesson" I linked to yesterday. And I thought Dr. Goldacre's article was particularly well-reasoned without being self-righteous in the way that anti-alt-med articles frequently are. The man has a captivating (and very British) style of writing that I enjoy. Furthermore, although it may be stretching things a bit, I even feel a bit of a kinship with the good doctor, as he has gotten a lot of flak from pro-alt-med factions – which somehow put me in mind of my own experiences facing The Wrath Of The Secretrons. Admittedly, however, Doc Ben's encounters have been a bit more serious than mine, and with higher stakes.

Now there are bad trials in medicine, of course, but here's the difference: in medicine there is a strong culture of critical self-appraisal. Doctors are taught to spot bad research (as I am teaching you now) and bad drugs. The British Medical Journal recently published a list of the top three most highly accessed and referenced studies from the past year, and they were on, in order: the dangers of the anti-inflammatory Vioxx; the problems with the antidepressant paroxetine; and the dangers of SSRI antidepressants in general. This is as it should be.

With alternative therapists, when you point out a problem with the evidence, people don't engage with you about it, or read and reference your work. They get into a huff. They refuse to answer calls or email queries. They wave their hands and mutter sciencey words such as "quantum" and "nano". They accuse you of being a paid plant from some big pharma conspiracy. They threaten to sue you. They shout, "What about thalidomide, science boy?", they cry, they call you names, they hold lectures at their trade fairs about how you are a dangerous doctor, they contact and harass your employer, they try to dig up dirt from your personal life, or they actually threaten you with violence (this has all happened to me, and I'm compiling a great collection of stories for a nice documentary, so do keep it coming).

For Dr. Goldacre’s full article, click here.

Dude, where’s my spam?
And, finally, I regret to tell you, Dear Ones, but for over three weeks now I haven’t received any emails at all from my favorite New-Wage spam service. I’m afraid they finally got wise to me. Maybe it has something to do with that old-nekkid-hippie potshot from a few weeks back (yes, there is a connection). But I’m still going to follow up on that story.

Oh, but I do miss my spam…

* Re Emanuel Schiffgens: Here is yet another good reason NOT to rely on Google translation. I Googled Emanuel Schiffgens and the first result that popped up was a page written in German. Despite my surname and ancestry, I do not read German. So I clicked the link to "translate this page," and here's what I got.