Wednesday, December 18, 2019

Saint Kevin Trudeau becomes GuruKev as Facebook clamps down on his "celebrity" page

When I was called KT, I had a fun “business mode” tycoon type vibration, as many wealthy tycoons used their initials as their “names”.

When I am called “Uncle Kevin”, I am broadcasting the frequency of a family member, a “sage” who can “read” you, teach you, and mentor you with love and kindness, someone who is wise and cares about you as family.

When people call me GuruKev, I am putting out a frequency mostly of love and light, and someone that can “transform” and totally plug into the “ether” thus being a total conduit of knowingness (and much more that I will not reveal here).
~ Kevin Trudeau, "What Is In a Name?", from
his new GuruKev web site

* * * * *

Lies are flowing out
Like golden showers on the Interwebz
They slither while they pass
Onto the feeds of brand new waves of rubes
Schemes to suck their wallets dry
Are targeting their open minds
Astounding and confounding them.
Lie, Guru Kevin, oh,
Leopards never change their spots
Leopards never change their spots
Leopards never change their spots
Leopards never change their spots...

~ To the tune of "Across The Universe" (with profound apologies to The Beatles)

As you may know if you're a regular reader of this blog, being confined to a Federal Prison Camp for years has never stopped serial scammer Kevin Trudeau, a Whirled-favorite topic for more than 10 years, from thinking up new scams and schemes and shticks. Clearly he's paving the way for his release in May 2022 (or sooner, if he and his minions can only get #NotMyPresident Donald Trump to commute his sentence and maybe even pardon him).

Shortly after he was first incarcerated in Chicago's notorious Metropolitan Correctional Center, ahead of the criminal-contempt trial that resulted in a conviction and ultimately landed him at FPC Montgomery (AL), Trudeau seriously began trying to re-brand himself as a spiritual leader. Through some of his most loyal proxies, he spread messages on social media of
miraculous revelations he was receiving from behind bars, promising that all would be revealed in good time. And with the help of minions and a passionate fan base, he built up impressive martyr creds, earning him the Whirled nickname of Saint Kevin.

Accordingly, I halfway thought he might be working up to a new shtick as a "Christian" prosperity preacher of some sort, once he got out of the clink. After all, even though he has certainly appealed to New-Wage/McSpirituality believers as well as motivational geeks who aren't particularly religious or spiritual, a significant part of his fan base considered themselves "Christians."

But it seems that Kevin Trudeau may be going in a different direction, spirituality-wise. Lately he has taken to branding himself as Guru Kev, and he is not using "guru" in the Western sense of being a master or ultimate expert at some mundane pursuit such as deceptive marketing or robbing people blind. Nope, he's using the word in the Eastern sense of being a spiritual master.

his new GuruKev web site, visitors are met with some new hype that sounds a lot like the old hype:

Your Wish Has Been Granted.
You have been looking for something and now you’ve found it.
What you have been seeking is here.
You asked, and this site has been given to you.
All your answers will be given to you.
Attain SUCCESS beyond your wildest dreams.
Riches – Health – Happiness
A “Real Guru” can help you make
all your dreams come true, in
EVERY area of your life.
A “Genuine Guru” can give you
that “something” that has been always
missing in your life.
An “Authentic Guru” can reveal
that “missing piece within” that
you always knew has been missing,
yet you cannot describe.

On the page from which I pulled the first passage preceding this post, as well as on a Facebook post I'll link to below, Trudeau 'splains the origin of his "Guru Kev" moniker. It is not a name he gave himself, he says, adding that the nicknames he's had in his life have been bestowed upon him by other folks, depending upon the sort of vibration or frequency he's putting out at the time. The implication is that he is controlling the vibes and therefore the nicknames, and that other people are simply responding to his skillful maneuvering and manipulation. (Of course he can teach you to be a master maneuverer and manipulator too, for a price.)

Well, frankly, I am offended that I've been overlooked once again. I have been calling Kevin names for years and years, in response to the vibrations and frequencies that he was clearly emitting. I've called him "True-dough," "Katie," the aforementioned "Saint Kevin," and, of course, "serial scammer." And once,
in response to that avuncular vibe of which he seems so proud, I even called him "Unca Kevin." But he didn't even mention those names.

I first found out about Katie's new guru shtick when I decided to pay a visit to the Kevin Trudeau Facebook page to see if there were any new announcements or revelations or something else eminently snarkworthy. Alas, the page did not show up in my search results. I thought perhaps I'd been blocked from seeing it, although that didn't make sense. I've been blocked for years from commenting on the page, or even from responding to it, but never from merely seeing it.

A bit of further searching revealed
a December 17, 2019 post on the Free Kevin Trudeau Facebook page (from which, as it happens, I'm also blocked from commenting or responding). The post, labeled "Priority communication from Kevin Trudeau," explains that the main Kevin Trudeau Facebook page has been taken down by Facebook and made inaccessible, due to new rules about Facebook pages that use celebrity names. Kevin's team is looking into it and will keep us posted.

The message of the "priority communication" is that the sudden inaccessibility of the page is not a problem but rather just another opportunity. And indeed, as you'll see if you scroll through
the Free Kevin Trudeau page, it seems to have taken over the promotion of the various schemes and info-frauducts that were previously promoted on the original Kevin Trudeau page.

There's a small complaint lodged in with all of the good cheer, though.

It has also come to my attention that in the “chaos”, for lack of a better word, that has ensued “out there” while I have been “in here”, there are a number of people, websites, social media pages, etc. that are spreading my messages, some with my permission and blessings, and others that are distorting my messages and even selling my copyrighted creations like “Your Wish Is Your Command”, “The Success Mastery Course”, “Nuggets of Gold”, and the “Science of Personal Mastery”. These particular individuals are claiming “rights” to my creations and selling them, seeking profit only for themselves, without my knowledge nor permission, nor the permission of GIN.

While some of these people have good intentions, this activity is both illegal and unethical. Clearly, this dilutes and distorts the purity of my message and is not in the best interest of ALL.

We are aware of them and they will be contacted and appropriate actions taken.

Many thanks and appreciation to those of you who are serving as my “eyes” to the “outside”. Keep up the good work!

By the way, if you are willing to help with being our “eyes to the outside”, please send an email indicating your willingness to assist with this "COMMENT BELOW"

Subject- “Eyes To The Outside”

We will get back to you with specific instructions. Thank you in advance, you are much appreciated!

Shame on anyone who tries to "dilute the purity" of a lifelong con artist's message!

By way of explaining the GuruKev nick, there's this:

Some of you may be wondering, "Why 'GuruKev'"? When people in the west use the word Guru it means something like "the ultimate expert; a master". I was called "America's Marking Guru" by the Wall Street Journal for example because of my expertise and success in that area.

Guru as used in the EAST, actually means "dispeller of darkness" or "one who sheds light", and refers to spiritual enlightenment, not expertise or mastery in some endeavor.

Over the last 7 years I was called "Kev" most of the time. During that time I taught many of the people here things like yoga, exercise, stretching, Kung Fu, Tai Chi, Chi Gong, Meditating, and "How to manifest your Dreams". Without any prompting, everyone suddenly started calling me "GuruKev".

I did not choose this name. This was the "title" or "label" that was given to me. Please read the post “What’s In A Name” for a partial explanation.
Reading this and other messages makes it clear that Kevin still has a soft spot in his heart for the Global Information Network, or GIN, the organization that began life as one of his biggest and most successful (for him) scams, and thrived as such for several years. It would seem that GIN still has a soft spot in their hearts for him as well, which I guess is understandable, in light of the fact that it's still being run by some of his pals.

A December 3, 2019 post on the Free Kevin Trudeau page mentions GIN, among other recommended sites. Apparently one of Katie's ex-con buddies, one Jason Sant, millionaire Mormon and proud Kevin Trudeau "mentee," has a paid scheme of his own going, thanks to Kevin (see number 3, "The Science of Conscious Creation"). Here, from the Facebook post that I've been quoting, is a short list of blessed-by-GuruKev sites, with some Cosmic Connie annotations.
PLEASE SHARE! There are so many amazing resources that continue to be made available from KT, both directly and indirectly through highly trained students of his! If you aren’t up to speed on everything that’s available, check out the following websites:

1. “Guru Kev” ( ... some of the latest and greatest FREE content from KT where he expands on many of the GIN principles, including six brand new lessons on “Who do you listen to?” [Fair warning: Nothing is really new in Katieland. ~ CC]

2. “The Science of Personal Mastery” ( ... an ongoing, intensive training course, coupled with KT’s “Nuggets of Gold” newsletter. It’s been said that of all the material KT has ever produced, THIS is his favorite! Available via donation to the KT legal defense fund. [The link on this item leads straight to the "KT Legal Defense Fund" site, on which the home page gives you several opportunities to "send good vibrations to KT, via monetary donations. The mailing address listed is for Winston & Strawn, LLP, one of numerous law firms that Katie has prevailed upon over the years to try to keep him out of hot water. (It's notable that their Wikipedia page does not list Kevin Trudeau in their "Notable Representations." I have a feeling that the firm considers him to be their biggest mistake ever.) Instructions for signing up for "The Science of Personal Mastery" course and the newsletter do not seem to be in evidence on the KT Legal Defense Fund site. In fact on the "Terms" page, it clearly states that the money is a contribution towards Katie's legal defense, that all amounts are non-refundable, and will go directly toward his "management and legal fees" -- and that the contributor does "clearly understand your contribution is not buying or purchasing any product and/or services." There's a "search" icon, but when I typed "science of personal mastery" into the search field, I got "Our apologies, nothing was found." So there's that. ~ CC]

3. “The Science of Conscious Creation” ( ... a training course based on 1,600 pages of information compiled during Jason Sant’s four-year intensive mentorship with KT in FPC Montgomery. SCC is a paid course that will provide a fresh new perspective on manifesting dreams, goals and desires and “consciously creating” the life of one’s dreams. SCC students who complete the foundational course will have access to advanced material disclosing coveted, proprietary business knowledge outlining specific action steps KT took to make millions of dollars in various industries. [Jason Sant went to prison for being a co-conspirator in a nationwide online foreclosure resuce scam. During the four years they were confined together, he became an eager student of Katie's. Turds of a feather... ~CC]

4. The Global Information Network ( Level VII training is now available! [When GIN was first launched the plan was to have 12 levels. Moving kinda slow... ~CC]

While we don’t have KT with us physically, he is still very active in making sure that his students have enough new material to continue creating the life of your dreams! We encourage you to engage in as much of the above-referenced material as possible!
[In other words... Katie and some of his closest cronies can suck your wallet dry remotely, so no worries. ~ CC]
Kevin's big dream: life on a cruise ship, and a new club with even less accountability than the old GIN
For the more materially-minded, GuruKev has
a twin site, "Nuggets of Gold." Fool's gold, I'd say. The intro page features the same type of breathy hype as the intro page on GuruKev, promising that each "Nugget" will give you a secret to help you obtain success in every area of life, and that every "Nugget" will be infused with secret knowledge and "energy." The more things change...

The domain registration info for both the GuruKev and the Nuggets of Gold sites shows an address in Ontario, Canada (96 Mowat Ave, Toronto, ON, M4K 3K1), though the actual owner name is shielded.

If "GuruKev" (and for that matter, "Nuggets of Gold") were just some more silly shticks, they would be merely snarkworthy at this point. After all, the great guru is currently confined to government sleepaway camp. How much damage can he do?

But don't underestimate him, or the loyalty of his fan base. Katie won't be confined forever, after all, and as it happens, he has big, big plans -- plans that not only echo GIN back in the day, but the evil cult-church Scientology as well.

You can get more than a hint by digging a little more deeply into the GuruKev site, such as
this "recruitment" page, which is titled, "POSITION AVAILABLE." It's signed by "Your friend, GuruKev." Here it is in part:
Over the next few years, it is my “desire” to have many great wonderful things manifest for the benefit of all of you...

...This “
Vision” includes the desire to build (or expand) a “Club” having members all over the world.

It also includes the building of a magnificent “Club Ocean Liner”. A SHIP that will be big enough for over 4000 passengers and be constantly travelling around the world.

This “Club Cruise Ship”, called Freedom, with be a virtual floating Clubhouse and similar to a Luxury 5 Star World Class Resort. This Ship will be ONE OF A KIND…The most unique and magnificent vessel on the seas (estimated cost to build: $1.5 Billion USD).

On the ship will be an area for “Residences” where Club members can buy a “Cabin/Home” to live full time, part time or have for vacations. It can also produce rental income when the owner is not “in residence” (like a second home or vacation home).

This Club “Flag Ship” will also be my main residence.

A “hotel” with luxurious cabins will also be part of the ship so that members can come and enjoy a vacation on the most magnificent “Luxury Cruise Ship” ever built.

Members will also be allowed to purchase “fractional ownership” in “Cabins/Homes” as well. This way a member can have 1 week or more on the ship “locked in” every year for “life” and get to cruise on the ship for a tiny fraction of normal commercial cruise rates on the major cruise lines.

The ship will be circumnavigating the globe and staying in exotic ports for up to 3 weeks at a time so that passengers can explore the beauty of cultures in various locations at a leisurely pace.

As a “Floating Clubhouse”, members in the club will be allowed to come on board with their guests, when the ship is in port. “Members Only” meetings, workshops, seminars, and trainings will be held on the ship. The ship will also host “Open Houses” which will include World Class entertainment and Seminars/Lectures, so that potential members can come aboard and see what The Club is all about.

The Ship will have the finest restaurants, spa, a “Natural Cures Health and Anti-Aging Clinic”, world class gym and fitness areas, the largest theater/showroom ever built on a cruise ship, and much more. It will be a utopian society, a virtual living paradise filled with happy, loving people from all over the world.

All new members will be invited to be on the ship for “New Member Orientation” Cruises free of charge. 
GuruKev blabs on a bit, and then gets to the recruitment part.
In order to make all the “Dreams” realities (including the writing of several new books and courses, relaunching my Radio Show and podcasts, establishing and building a “Land Based Headquarters, Community, and Retreat” exclusively for Club Members, and many other projects), I will need a team of dedicated people who share the same Vision as I do, have the same passion that I do, and are willing to devote 100% of their time to making all these dreams come true, as I am.

This fully committed “Mastermind Group” or “Team Alpha” (Team ONE)  will consist of people who will be my personal private staff. The team will live with me, work directly with me, travel with me, and be 100% focused on accomplishing the “Mission” of serving humanity by bettering the lives of people all around the world.

Being on Team Alpha is more than “full time” service to humanity, this is “All the Time” service to humanity while you are a member of this exclusive group. Thus, only a “Few” will be drawn to apply to be a staff member on this highly selective and unique “Team Alpha” mastermind.

Team Alpha will work directly with me and for me, side by side, together working to make the “Dreams” actually “happen”.

Being on “Team Alpha” is not for someone with a mild interest. It is certainly not for everyone. Team members will be those few rare people who, once hearing about this, “Know” this is their calling, their mission, and their purpose. It is for people who are ready to be “ALL IN”.

Here is the most exciting part. While working together, you will also be “trained”, taught, and coached by me personally, together as a group, and one on one. You will receive the highest and most advanced training available. This training will be delivered to you first, before anyone else in the world. Team members will be the most fully trained members in the Club, and in some instances get exclusive training that will not be delivered to the general membership.

This training will make you a master of manifesting your desires, and attaining inner states of total emotional and spiritual freedom. You will attain complete “Liberation” and become a true “Master”.

For the right person, this is a dream come true, a once in a lifetime opportunity.

Some of you right now are probably already bouncing off the walls with excitement and enthusiasm. Some of you will have a very hard time sleeping tonight thinking “This is too good to be true!”

Well, it is true.

We will also establish the “Volunteer Service Corps” (VSC).

This will be for people who still want to work with me personally, be a part of the mission, and who share my vision.  But perhaps they have families or have other reasons and responsibilities as to why they who do not want to have a 100% all-consuming life working on the manifesting of the “Dream”.

These people still want to be a major part of making the Dream happen, but would rather prefer to have a more “normal life”, work only normal full time or part time hours, and who get to “go home after work” to be with their family and friends. 
Then he tells you how you can apply to be considered for one of these enviable positions. The address to write to is someone named "Tonya Canada" in Snyder, Texas. GuruKev helpfully adds that the recruitment process includes:
1.) Candidates getting all the information about the opportunity, getting all their questions answered, and deciding if they have a burning desire to be on one of the teams and be considered.

2.)”Testing” the candidates, with such programs as CliftonStrengths assessments and other such tools. Then determining who we will consider offering Membership in the Volunteer Service Corps (VSC) or Team Alpha (TA). This will be based on multiple factors including competence, experience, expertise in various areas that are needed, the candidate’s burning desire level and intensity to be on the team, and other considerations.
I'm pretty sure there will be a "financial fitness" test as well, but there's no mention of it on the page.

So, is any of this beginning to sound familiar? Take that "Team Alpha" bit (please): GIN "Inner Circle," anyone? And as for that "Volunteer Service Corps".... shades of Scientology? In fact, that whole cruise-ship idea is unpleasantly reminiscent of
Scientology's notoriously abusive SeaOrg. A friend remarked that Trudeau is "going full L. Ron Hubbard!"

Indeed, I've heard from various sources over the years that one of Trudeau's long-time goals is to have an organization somewhat like Scientology, with his own body of work as the basis. And it's pretty easy to imagine Trudeau using international waters to violate labor laws and create an entire brigade of volunteers to serve his every need.

None of this should be very surprising to anyone who knows Kevin Trudeau's background. He has dabbled in Scientology over the years,
famously recommended Scientology and its intro book, Dianetics, to his employees years ago (here's a direct link to a 2003 memo), and, according to a January 2015 piece in Business Insider (under "Up Close And Personal"), his prenup required one of his ex-wives, Kristine Dorow, to reach a certain level in Scientology. I've blogged about all of this stuff before, but it certainly bears revisiting now.

All of the above is part of a grand "Vision," outlined on a separate page on the GuruKev site, for a brand new seekrit club. And if you think you've seen all of this before, of course you have. This is the same laundry list of promises that accompanied the launch of GIN more than ten years ago. I believe that list also included GIN yachts, as well as banks and schools and an entire separate infrastructure solely for GIN members. As we... well, okay, I... like to say on this blog, it's deja screw all over again.

One point seems clear: Federal prison is a great incubator for scams. Guru Kev -- and his "mentee"
Jason Sant, for that matter -- are living proof. You probably don't need me to tell you this, but I'd advise taking a healthy dose of caveat emptor along with that "love and light" vibe that Guru Kev and his pals are pushing.

This post has been updated to include the information about "The Club," and the 'magnificent "Club Ocean Liner"' -- i.e., with the exception of the last paragraph, everything under the subhead, "Kevin's big dream" etc. I have also added my annotations, including additional links, to the list of "GuruKev-approved" web sites in the first section of this post. ~ CC, 20 December, 2019

UPDATE 3 February 2020: Today a friend who's an ex-GIN member emailed me a copy of a February 2 email she received from Jason Sant, promoting Kevin Trudeau's promotion of Sant. So apparently Sant's SCCam is live, and being promoted via email blasts. As I said above, caveat emptor.
Click on pic to enlarge.

  Related on this Whirled:

Sunday, December 08, 2019

Flawsuits and bad whines and fake Xmas wars: a few Sunday leftovers

It's a lazy Sunday, and since I don't feel like cooking up a substantial post from scratch today, I'm serving a plate of reheated leftovers, in the form of updates on previous posts.

Tony Baloney banks on luck o'the Irish to stifle BuzzFeed News and Twitter
Earlier this year, on
May 29 and June 22 to be exact, I wrote a couple of posts about BuzzFeed News' ongoing series covering accusations against selfish-help icon Tony Robbins. Robbins had been accused by numerous parties of emotional, physical, and in some cases sexual abuse and misconduct. He had repeatedly denied the allegations and had threatened to sue BuzzFeed if they didn't retract their stories and/or quit writing about him.

As I noted in an update to my June 22 post, but am bumping it up here as well (along with some additional content), BuzzFeed published yet another installment in its Tony Robbins series on November 22, 2019 --
that's Part 6, for those who are keeping track. This latest story covered Robbins' alleged sexual abuse of a minor female at a summer camp in Southern Cali way back in 1985, when Tony was 25, but already rich and famous.

Following the publication of that piece, Tony, who denies those allegations as well, had apparently had enough.
He has now decided to SLAPP Buzzfeed with a defamation flawsuit, and is currently threatening to sue Twitter too in the bargain, apparently for allowing people to tweet about the Buzzfeed series. But he's not suing in the United States; rather, he's suing in Ireland, with his lawyer rationalizing that Dublin is Twitter's European headquarters.

a Scribd link to the complaint.

The Irish Times reported that Robbins is being represented by a Belfast-based libel lawyer named Paul Tweed, who denies the claim that Robbins, like other public figures who have filed unsuccessful defamation suits in the United States, is engaging in "libel tourism." Tweed also countered BuzzFeed's accusation that Robbins was abusing the Irish courts, since BuzzFeed's headquarters and primary audience are in the US. He noted that the BuzzFeed journalists who wrote the articles are based in the UK. But BuzzFeed spoksman Matt Mittenthal responded to that by pointing out that Ireland is "a sovereign nation that hasn't been part of the UK for nearly 100 years. This is a bizarre and flimsy attempt to justify a transparent legal manoeuvre."

And Mike Masnick,
writing on the TechDirt site on December 4, cut to the chase:
Of course, the real reason to sue in Ireland is because either lawsuit would be laughed out of court in the US. The bar to prove defamation against a public figure like Robbins would make it nearly impossible for Robbins to win a defamation lawsuit here, unless he could somehow prove that Buzzfeed made up the reporting, which seems highly unlikely. And, of course, Section 230 of the CDA would protect Twitter. Even in Europe, it seems unlikely that Twitter could be held liable for how other people tweeted, just because Mr. Robbins is "aggrieved" about how this story spread.
Meanwhile, BuzzFeed continues to stand by their reporting.

Whinemaker Trump Junior gets triggered again
In late November
I posted a lengthy snarkalysis about the reactions to Donald Trump Jr.'s first book, Triggered: How the Left Thrives on Hate and Wants to Silence Us, which had been released earlier that month. The book quickly soared to the top of some prestigious bestseller lists, but lots of folks were crying foul in the wake of revelations that numerous republican/conservative orgs, including the Republican National Committee (RNC) made bulk purchases.

One point I made in my post was that even though sales of DJTJ's magnum dopus were indeed artificially boosted by those mass purchases, the book most likely would have done pretty well on its own, thanks to the cult of Trumpism. I also pointed out that although it's a given that the Trump family are scammers, bulk purchasing isn't illegal and in fact is commonly done, by scammers and non-scammers alike.

But I also made the point, as I have before, that right-wingers and conservatives seem to be more easily "triggered" (and hate-filled) than the lefties and liberals whom they're continually accusing of being hyper-sensitive snowflakes. Junior himself filled the pages of Triggered with his own whining about how awfully he and his family have been treated. As if to reinforce that particular point, on November 30
DJTJ uncorked another bottle of red whine on Twitter when he groused that airport bookstores operated by Hudson News bookstores are refusing to sell Triggered. He griped that he'd been in seven different airports that week and hadn't seen it. "Why not have the #1 book?" he tweeted. "Usual BS I suppose?"

The tweet, with its strong implication of a nefarious liberal conspiracy to squelch the book,
inspired his minions to flood Hudson News' social media accounts, berating them for their alleged participation in the conspiracy. But Junior's lament also inspired a flood of snarky rejoinders from those who are, to put it mildly, not supporters. One Twitter user responded to Trump's complaint by saying that he thought the books were fully stocked in the fiction section; another one, using the handle @MuellerSheWrote, noted that "there are boxes and boxes of them at the RNC."

Apparently Triggered is for sale on Hudson Booksellers' website, but regarding its brick-and-mortar stores, Hudson didn't respond to request from Newsweek for comment about Junior's tweet.

I wonder if Junior also thinks it's part of the "usual BS"/triggered-lib conspiracy that his book
was pretty quickly bumped from its number-one spot on the New York Times bestseller list by a scathing tome about his daddy, A Warning, By Anonymous

Phony holiday wars continue
Just the other day I was nattering about the phony "war on Christmas," which this year was joined, thanks to #NotMyPresident Donald John Trump, by the phony "war on Thanksgiving." With my usual gift for stating the painfully obvious, I predicted that despite Trump's declaration that the Xmas "war" had been won, the conservanoids weren't about to relinquish that phony construct entirely.

And along comes
right-wing nutcake/culture-wars veteran/Trump ally/career hypocrite Newt Gingrich to prove me right. He and another top Trumpanzee, former Acting Attorney (and scammer) General Matthew Whitaker, have come right out and stated that those demonic Democrats, with all of that impeachment nonsense, are ruining Christmas. #Impeachment is the new #HappyHolidays, I guess.

Newt went on Fox News to cry his crocodile tears about the degradation of the holiday by the impeachment, which in typical Trumpian form he described as "a modern-day lynch mob." But as many others have pointed out, including Charlie Nash on Mediaite,
Newt himself participated in the ruination of Christmas back on December 19, 1998 when he was Speaker of the House of Representatives, and the House voted to impeach President Bill Clinton.

Jack Holmes,
writing in Esquire, also made note of Gingrich's hypocrisy, adding:
...what tale of shameless grandstanding would be complete without a contribution from Matthew Whitaker, the former Big Dick Toilet Salesman whom the president once saw fit to make the Acting Attorney General of the United States?
That's right, folks: turn off that Bing Crosby. Shut down the Mariah Carey. Nix the "Wonderful Christmastime"—which, contrary to blasphemous reports in this very magazine, is good. It's going to be all impeachment, all the time. Give your Dad a congressional gavel in a box. (Or a T-shirt from War on Christmas x Impeachment.) Of course, what Whitaker's really saying is that people may be forced to discuss the president's assault on the American Constitution at some point this holiday season, which simply will not do. Then again, this is the same guy who jumped on Fox News in October to declare that "abuse of power is not a crime." It is, however, the most essential reason to impeach a president. Merry Christmas.
Merry Christmas indeed. And a Happy Impeachment.

That's it for now; more soon.

Thursday, December 05, 2019

Udder inanity: Devin Nunes, bogus-bovine battler, files yet another defamation flawsuit

Back in March of this year, the Interwebz were all a-Twitter about a defamation flawsuit filed by Congressclown Devin Nunes (R-California), who is currently the rank republican member... I mean the ranking republican member of various committees and subcommittees of the US House of Representatives, and who in more recent weeks has taken his comedy stylings to the public impeachment hearings against #NotMyPresident Donald John Trump.

The Nunes litigation that had, and still has, the Internet bellowing with laughter is Devin's suit against a fake cow on Twitter, as well as against various other fake parties. Actually they're satirical Twitter accounts that make fun of our little diva Dev. His feelings have been terribly hurt by the derision. I was one of countless hordes of folks who snarked about this when the story was new-ish --
here's that Whirled link for you -- and I'm back with another round because of a couple of recent developments.

The first development is really just
a humorous addendum to the ongoing phony-cow saga. Since the lawsuit was initiated in March, Nunes has been laboring to get Twitter to give up the goods on the anon Twitter users who run the fake-cow account and another satirical account by "Devin Nunes' Mom." In October, Nunes' attorney issued a subpoena demanding records from former Democratic National Committee employee Adam Parkhomenko, who presumably had been corresponding with the puckish anons. Parkhomenko's attorney responded with a filing to quash the subpoena, arguing that the Twitter accounts are clearly satirical and do not constitute defamation, and that the courts have a responsibility to protect anonymous communications, in the interests of protecting free speech. On November 26, the Sacramento Bee reported:
“No reasonable person would believe that Devin Nunes’ cow actually has a Twitter account, or that the hyperbole, satire and cow-related jokes it posts are serious facts,” reads the filing in Virginia’s Henrico County Circuit Court. “It is self-evident that cows are domesticated livestock animals and do not have the intelligence, language, or opposable digits needed to operate a Twitter account. Defendant ‘Devin Nunes’ Mom’ likewise posts satirical patronizing, nagging, mothering comments which ostensibly treat Mr. Nunes as a misbehaving child.”
For extended (and well-deserved) mockery, check out this Damage Report video.

If you can't access the embedded vid, here's the direct YouTube link.
The second development that inspired me to return to the old blogging board on behalf of our delicate Devin is the announcement a couple of days ago of yet another defamation flawsuit he's filed. This one is about more serious matters. True to recent threats he'd made, Nunes is suing CNN for $435 million over a report that an associate of Trump's personal ghoul Rudy Giuliani claimed Nunes had met with a former Ukrainian official late last year in Vienna, in order to help dig up some dirt on former VP Joe Biden. Since Trump et al.'s shenanigans re Ukraine are at the center of the impeachment hearings, it's understandable that Devin would be a little upset.

Indeed, employing his customary histrionics, Nunes disputed the story and called the CNN report "demonstrably false and scandalous" and a "hit piece," despite the fact that other parties in question stated their willingness to testify under oath that the story is true. Nunes added that CNN is the mother of fake news and is eroding the fabric of America.

What's interesting is that this suit, along with Nunes' threats to sue other media outlets reporting on Nunes and Ukraine, may actually undermine Trump's impeachment defense -- at least according to
a November 26 opinion piece written for USA Today by none other than Jonathan Turley, who had his own starring comedic role in the second phase of public impeachment hearings that began December 4.

One can only hope that Turley is right. In fact, I'm willing to exercise some rare-for-me optimism and predict that the efforts of both Nunes and Turley will strengthen the case for impeachment. At least I'm willing to entertain that possibility, or let it entertain me.

* * * * *
It's abundantly clear by now that when he isn't busy with his overwrought performances in public hearings, and his other attempts to embed himself even more deeply into Trump's aperture, Devin Nunes is udderly consumed with suing people and animals, both real and imaginary. This past October, the LA Times ran a piece by columnist Robin Abcarian, summarizing the frivolous and vexatious litigation in which Nunes had been involved up until that time. Besides the fake-cow litigation, Nunes also sued an organic peach farmer and various reporters. Abcarian wrote:
To help get a sense of the injury caused by an organic peach farmer, reporters and a fake cow, Nunes’ lawsuits first lay out what a fantastic guy Nunes is:

“Nunes’ career as a U.S. Congressman is distinguished by his honor, dedication and service to his constituents and his country, his honesty, integrity, ethics, reputation for truthfulness and veracity.”

This is a helpful corrective, I guess, because most people think of Nunes as the Trump lackey who
sneaked into the White House in the middle of the night last year to receive information that he turned around and claimed to be presenting to Trump for the first time the next day. Instead of really trying to figure out how Russia had mucked about in the 2016 election, Nunes was helping Trump make a case against American spy agencies.
As I mentioned in my own post last March, Nunes was a co-sponsor of the "Discouraging Frivolous Lawsuits Act," along with dozens of other republicans.

But this current Ukrainian sideshow must really be rattling him. As Scott Shackford, writing for the Libertarian publication Reason, noted,
Nunes is getting a taste of his own medicine. After all, he once attacked those who wanted to restrain the NSA's snooping, but now the shoe is on the other cloven hoof.
Now this surveillance apparatus that Nunes has long supported has happily provided his political opponents with information that could destroy his career. The House Permanent Select Committee on Intelligence (which Nunes used to chair, and where he is now the ranking minority member) just published its impeachment report. It shows calls between Nunes and Rudy Giuliani in 2016, as Giuliani was making the media rounds arguing that Ukrainian officials colluded to help Hillary Clinton's presidential campaign. This information will most certainly be used to argue that Nunes is not just a defender of Trump but also an active participant in Giuliani's Ukrainian push.
I wish that all of this stuff were simply silly, like the threats and occasional legal actions of another litigious Whirled snarget, fake doctor/cancer quack/conspiranoid/fascist Leonard Coldwell. But there's a graver import, as the Fresno Bee editorial board explained today in a piece noting that Devin Nunes and his blind allegiance to Trump constitute the real danger to the republic.
As the ranking Republican on the powerful House Intelligence Committee, Nunes holds one of the top posts in Congress. Nunes should have disclosed to his committee colleagues that he had those phone calls last spring. One expert on government ethics took it a step further and said Nunes should have recused himself from the impeachment hearings, rather than acting as No. 1 Trump defender.

To advance the cause of getting at the truth, Nunes should come clean on the phone calls and tell the House what was discussed. He should also provide travel records to debunk the charge that he met in Vienna last December with the Ukrainian to get information that might hurt Biden; Nunes says he was in Libya and Malta.

Short of that, his actions continue to reduce him to being a mere partisan — the label with which he loves to tarnish his Democrat colleagues...
Yeah, what the Bee said. And by the way, their parent company, McClatchy, has also been sued by Nunes. But if his goal is to chill free speech... well, as the Bee pointed out in a November 27 editorial, it's not working (so far, anyway). The fake cow keeps on mooing, and the online jeers are only growing louder.

PS added on 8 December 2019: A member of the Daily Kos community, Sher Watts Spooner, posted a piece on why Diva Nunes may regret SLAPPing his critics. It's a good, concise summary of Nunes' litigious lunacy. Read it.