Wednesday, September 27, 2006

Cosmic, yummy and hot (or at least cosmic)

Today is the two-month anniversary of Whirled Musings, and I have celebrated the occasion by popping a new profile pic up on the blog, which is about all the blogwork I feel like doing today. You will notice that I am still a little blue around the gills, a purely intentional artifact. Someday I might actually post a pic with my true colors, but for now...well, I just think the blue goes so well with the general ambience of this particular blog template.

Speaking of which, I am aware that of all the templates offered by Blogger, I chose what is almost indisputably the ugliest one. But somehow the combination of pastel dots and the dark background seemed to fit the blog's theme. I would change the background to the twinkly stars on the home page of my Cosmic Relief web site, but I don't know enough HTML, and besides, it might make the blog even harder to read onscreen than it already is. So I'm letting well enough alone.

Since I'm mostly taking a break from blogging today, I am not going to go on and on the way I usually do. I did, however, want to make note of a new book that has come to my attention. I thought of it when I was reading today's post on Steve Salerno's SHAMblog, in which he mentioned a book title he facetiously suggested to his then-agent back in the late eighties:
The How-to-Stay-Forever-Young-By-Losing-That-Ugly-Cellulite-
in-Three-Weeks-
Plus-I-Slept-With-Elvis-Diet! He's probably not too far off-base when he suggests that the book almost certainly would have sold. After all, the more buzzwords and oh-wow concepts you can cram into one title, the better.

And that's why my attention was captured, at least momentarily, by
The Cosmic Chocolate Orgasm: Birthing The Mystic Lover In You. Though no byline appears on the cover, the book was apparently brought to us by two spiritual leading lights who go by the names of Raj and Suzanne, publishers of a quarterly spiritual journal called Way Of The Heart.

Now, with a hot delicious title such as The Cosmic Chocolate Orgasm, you'd think the book would be a shoe-in for the number-one spot on Amazon and a segment on Oprah. Alas, it does not seem to be about chocolate, nor about orgasms. But it does appear to be rather cosmic, judging from the description in the email I received:
Yes, this book is for the Mystic Lover - defined as one who embarks on a profound journey of transformation....for the love of God.

This incredible new 224 page book illustrated with beautiful photographs contains the essence of five years of Jayem’s teachings - splendid chapters on how to embrace the Mystic Lover inside of us, to find that Pathway to the Divine and peppered throughout with meditations, poems and wisdom gleaned from the key teachings of Jeshua ben Joseph (Jesus).

When they ask you, "What is this belief, this understanding, this teaching which moves you so?" No more do you search for what to say, how to explain or to encapsulate in words the feeling that is gracing your heart – you just smile and hand them this awesome collection of gemstones – "Cosmic Chocolate Orgasm" …and they will know what you are about and appreciate who you really are.
You can have your own copy of Cosmic Chocolate Orgasm for only $24.95 US plus $10.00 shipping (air mail post) -- or six copies for only $125.00 US, which includes shipping.

As for me...heck, I'm already quite cosmic enough. For now, I'll just concentrate on real chocolate and the big O, and I'm not talking about Oprah. So you go ahead and read The Cosmic Chocolate Orgasm. Let me know if it was good for you.

Not cosmic, but a bit caustic...
If you'd like to read a book whose title more accurately reflects the contents, Steve Salerno's book, SHAM: How The Self-Help Movement Made America Helpless, was just released in paperback yesterday. So turn off Dr. Phil, toss aside
He's Just Not That Into You, and pick up something a bit contrarian for a change. You'll be glad you did.

4 comments:

Steve Salerno said...

Thank you, CosCon! That is very sweet of you...why, every bit as sweet as a giant chocolate orgasm, I'm sure.

Cosmic Connie said...

Yes, but is it as sweet as a COSMIC giant chocolate orgasm? Anyway, you're welcome! And I hope SHAM is a great success.

Trish Ryan said...

So wait...now chocolate is the path to divine connection, and THAT'S the orgasm?

Theologically, physiologically - no matter how you look at it, that's just sad!

Cosmic Connie said...

Yes, Trish, as funny as it is on one level, at its core it is pretty sad, as is most of the stuff I make fun of on this blog.

Don't get me wrong; I don't think there is anything silly *or* sad about the search for God or meaning or fulfillment. We're all involved in that search in one way or another. What I do find silly, and sometimes sad, are...well, the things I make fun of on this blog.

I admit I have not read "The Cosmic Chocolate Orgasm," but near as I can tell from reading the promo copy, the book is vaguely based on a Christ-centered mysticism. Beyond that, I couldn't say.

BTW, I just visited your delightful blog, which led me to your web site, and I spent over two hours reading your stuff and following the links listed on your site. I had a great time! Didn't get any work done this afternoon as a result, but hey, I can work tomorrow.

Thanks for writing!