Whirled Musings

Across the Universe with Cosmic Connie, aka Connie L. Schmidt...or maybe just through the dung-filled streets and murky swamps of pop culture -- more specifically, the New-Age/New-Wage crowd, pop spirituality & religion, pop psychology, self(ish)-help, business babble, media silliness, & related (or occasionally unrelated) matters of consequence. Hope you're wearing boots. (By the way, the "Cosmic" bit in my moniker is IRONIC.)

Monday, March 02, 2009

As the Whirled churns...

It's been way too long since I've blogged, but I wanted to throw out a few meaty snippets before I settle back and relax after a very busy Monday.

Are things looking up for Melbourne's Mini-Madoff?
It appears that "controversial" (his description) Australian Secret star David Schirmer, currently on tour in the good old US of A, has caught a bit of a lucky break. Ben Fordham, the reporter from the Aussie tabloid show A Current Affair (ACA)
who has been on Schirmer's case, is now facing legal troubles of his own. These are not related to Ben's numerous stories about Schirmer, but rather to another story he did about a politician who allegedly ordered the contract killing of a male prostitute. In pursuit of this story Ben and another ACA reporter, Andy Byrne, allegedly used a hidden camera and published the resulting footage; they are charged with violation of Australian laws concerning the use of listening devices. The two are also charged with concealing a serious offense (i.e., the alleged ordering of the contract killing). The person who allegedly ordered the killing, a 71-year-old former mayor, has also been charged. The alleged murder for hire did not take place, so arguably the ACA guys saved a man's life. Here's a link to the story.

As you might expect, David Schirmer has publicly commented about this, writing: "...ACA is the most stupid show on TV … as well as totally inaccurate, deceptive and slanderous. Ben Fordham has sought to ruin many good Australians over the years with lies and deception. I don’t wish anyone to go to prison, I do hope though that justice is done to Fordham for the evil he has done to many people." This was a comment to a February 25 piece on the Aussie TV site, "What's On The Tube."

As I noted in a comment to the discussion around my post of 18 February, I do not, and never have, condoned illegal or unethical tactics by journalists. From both a legal and ethical standpoint, the end does not necessarily justify the means. Journalists shouldn't play police detective; that's a sure way to get into trouble. And yes, I am and always have been aware that A Current Affair is concerned more about ratings than anything else. Frankly, this is also the case with many of the more "legitimate" news outlets, including those in the US – but tabloid shows are notoriously less concerned than the more mainstream outlets with journalistic ethics, and more interested in sensationalism. But this doesn't mean that they never hit upon the truth; I think they do. Still, you have to consider the source; this is tabloid TV, after all.

Even so, I don't believe that ACA just made up everything about David Schirmer out of whole cloth; where there's smoke there's fire, and all that. (Furthermore, I have never believed that the evidence for Schirmer's misdeeds is based solely on the information in the ACA exposes.) Moreover, this latest turn of events is not proof, or even very good evidence, that Schirmer is innocent of any of the accusations against him. Ben Fordham's troubles, however, do seem to give Schirmer a little boost in his campaign to convince the world of his own innocence. This is what I think we might call one of those "unintended consequences." Even if Ben, in his relentless pursuit of stories, was motivated by something higher than his own self-interest, and even if he actually intended for his scandal-mongering to do some good for other people, all of that good work could potentially be undone by one foolish act. Too bad.

However, Ben and Andy have said they will vigorously defend themselves, and although as I said I don't condone dodgy journo tactics, I find myself rooting for them, hoping at the very least that they can avoid prison. Matter of fact, I've never advocated prison for the David Schirmers of the world either. I think prison should be reserved for violent criminals who pose a real physical danger to society. I can't speak for the people who were allegedly wronged by Schirmer, but I don't think they're necessarily interested in seeing him go to prison either. Heck, they probably just want their money back. And I'm guessing that a few sincere apologies would be a nice touch too.

But none of this seems likely to happen as David Schirmer prepares to expand his brand in the US, while sweeping all of his problems in Oz under the proverbial rug. There's even speculation that the Schirmers may decide to relocate to America. Meanwhile David is continuing his whirlwind tour of the US. During his stop in Chicago he reportedly "had an awesome meeting with Vic Conant." That would be Vic Conant of Nightingale-Conant, the famous publishers of self-help and motivational audio products from some of the biggest "names" in the biz.

Now, I have no idea whether Vic was as awed by David as David apparently was by Vic, or if Vic was just being the nice polite guy he is reputed to be, and figured that everyone deserves a listen. Nor do I have any idea what the meeting was about, although I have a feeling David was there to pitch his products and perhaps suggest ideas for new ones. I'd be very careful if I were Nightingale-Conant, though. I would make sure that what David Schirmer is offering isn't based on the work of his former joint-venture bud Bob Proctor, a long-time Nightingale-Conant staple. I have a feeling that Proctor's legal team wouldn't be very happy about that, particularly in light of the legal actions Proctor took against Schirmer last year. I may be wrong, but it looks to me as if Schirmer is still actively promoting some material that is based on Proctor's work, e.g., the "Australian Born Rich Program," which Schirmer says is a live seminar based around the book, You Were Born Rich (a Proctor classic). In happier times, Schirmer and Proctor did some live seminars together in Australia, and for a while Schirmer was selling DVDs and other material based on those seminars. Even if he has since repackaged them and had the Bob parts edited out, I'm not so sure that Bob would be happy about the prospect of the person he successfully sued for deceptive practices making money off of his, Bob's, name and work. And I'm pretty sure that Nightingale-Conant wouldn't want their own good name besmirched by copyright infringement issues.

Then again, Nightingale-Conant can probably take care of themselves. They've been in business a long time and, as I've said, they've published the works of many of the world's most famous motivators and self-improvement experts (so far they've published three audio packages by Joe Vitale). At one time they even offered a version of the Mega-Memory Course by the infamous Kevin Trudeau. Kevin has certainly had his share of troubles, but I'm sure that even though he no longer seems to be in their active catalog, he made a lot of money for Nightingale-Conant. And maybe that's all that really counts.

In any case, I have a feeling that if Nightingale-Conant liked Kevin Trudeau, they are absolutely going to love David Schirmer.

That's Sir Hustledork to you
Speaking of cons, the star of the latest US financial scandal, Texas tycoon
"Sir" R. Allen Stanford (who, come to think of it, sort of bears a resemblance to the aforementioned Kevin Trudeau), still has not been arrested, although one of his fall gals, the Chief Investment Officer at Stanford Financial Group, was taken into custody by the FBI February 26 on charges of obstructing an investigation.

So are you thinking what I'm thinking? What I'm thinking is that Sir Allen would fit just perfectly in the New-Wage/selfish-help industry, especially if he can manage to stay out of prison. As we know, however, even a prison record cannot significantly damage the earning power of a true master.

In some ways Sir Allen stands head and shoulders above some of the New-Wage industry's leading hustledorks, who have only their phony doctorate degrees, whereas Sir Allen has that whole phony knighthood thing going. Still, I imagine the New-Wagers would gladly welcome him into their fold, and their followers would give him standing ovations at any magical money-attracting seminar where he appeared.

At the very least, once Sir Allen gets past those little setbacks he's currently facing, he should seriously consider writing a motivational bestseller and putting on a bunch of hugely expensive seminars. (He probably already has a book deal or two, but he really needs to cram some New-Wage spiritual concepts and probably some quantum physics into his book, just to have all of his bases covered.) He is, if nothing else, a master at self-reinvention, and could probably teach even some of the most seasoned selfish-help spruikers a thing or two by example. This is from a recent piece by Houston Chronicle columnist Loren Steffy:

Claims that strain credulity were the foundation of Stanford’s business.

On its Web site, the firm claimed it traced its roots to the Great Depression, when the grandfather of founder R. Allen Stanford started an insurance company in Mexia.

Stanford’s father, though, told the Chronicle last week that he sold the insurance business and that his son had nothing to do with it.

Nor was Sir Allen related to the founder of Stanford University, as the firm claimed until the school sued for trademark infringement.

Instead, the future Sir Allen reportedly started a fitness club in Waco that soon went bust. Then he and his father began in the late 1980s buying up distressed real estate in the wake of the savings and loan crisis.

In 2000, Sir Allen told the Chronicle he founded his Caribbean bank on Montserrat with money left over from funds he’d raised for a real estate deal.

That’s no way to start a bank. In the U.S., it’s a violation of securities laws to collect money for one purpose and use it for another.

Later, after he’d become wealthy and his operations were ensconced in Antigua, Sir Allen began claiming he’d been knighted by England’s Prince Phillip but stopped after Buckingham Palace refuted it. He continues to use the knightly title, though, which was bestowed by Antigua’s prime minister.

The little lies are designed to build up credibility among unsuspecting investors, to paint over the cracks of suspicion that might otherwise cause the scheme to crumble.

Ironically enough, Sir Allen lost a bit of money to the infamous Bernie Madoff, proving that even the conman isn't too smart to get conned. As for the people who got conned by Sir Allen, well... it's not that I don't have sympathy for them (as I do for Madoff's victims), but then again, I have to think that at least some of them have to bear some responsibility. Liars can't profit much without people who are willing to suspend all judgment and believe the lies. As the self-described "non-award-winning political satirist" David Bourgeois wrote recently in the Huffington Post:

The poor saps were lured into this Ponzi scheme with the elixir of unrealistic riches; their thirst for off-the-charts financial gains blinded them to the obvious scam going on right under their noses.

If we really want to weep for victims of financial chicanery, how about we start with the thousands of workers losing their jobs due to extreme financial mismanagement?

Anyway, I'm thinking that Sir Allen could really find his niche teaching the hopeful but desperate masses how to excavate splendid new moneymaking ops from the rubble of this shaken economy. After all, that's what he did back in the 1980s, taking advantage of the wreckage left by the savings and loan crisis, which fueled his meteoric rise to wealth beyond belief. Today's distressed economic climate seems to be an excellent breeding ground for future Sir Roberts. They just need a really good teacher.

Con artist or not, there are many in Antigua who claim they don't care what their knight did wrong, because Sir Allen did right by them. This is from another Houston Chronicle story:

“In America, I’m afraid his goose is cooked, but we will always respect him here for what he brought to the country,” said a merchant who asked not to be named discussing a man who casts such a huge shadow.

“I will tell you, what he has done for this country is remarkable — legal or illegal — and nobody can dispute that,” he continued.

There, you see? It's all good. So... welcome to the New Wage, Sir Allen! I have no doubt that the hustlers will save you a place at the head of their table, where they sit and continue to stuff themselves, occasionally tossing out crumbs to the starving commoners who are simply trying to get into the banquet room. I am sure that you will be an inspiration to many in the years to come.

Whither the SGR club?
While we're on the topic of New-Wagers and shady schemes... remember that
"Three Amigos" Science of Getting Rich (SGR) scheme with Secret stars Bob Proctor, Jack Canfield and Michael Beckwith? You know, the one that played on the fame of The Secret, even though Rhonda Byrne and T.S. Productions took pains to inform people that SGR was not in any way affiliated with The Secret or T.S. Productions? This was the scheme where people paid nearly two thousand good U.S. dollars to get a briefcase filled with papers and CDs and stuff. And then they had a chance to sucker other people into buying briefcases, which would earn the sellers handsome commissions and enable them to buy expensive cars or houses or lovers or vacations or whatever they desired for building the life of their dreams.

Well, it seems that deal has completely disappeared from the main SGR site. Go there now and all you get are some tips on copywriting. Hmmm.

But for those who are nostalgically inclined, the scheme lives on in some old affiliate videos, such as this one. I have to wonder: Did the SGR operation get shut down because the number of people who realized what a scam it was finally reached critical mass? I remember that early on there was some suspicion that the plan wasn't exactly legal and bordered on being a pyramid scheme; Oprah reportedly even strongly criticized it, and Michael Beckwith apparently dropped out of the scheme for a while, though he later returned. I've blogged about this on several occasions besides the post I linked to in the "Three Amigos" paragraph above. For example, there's this post; scroll down to the subhead, "Riding The Secret gravy train." (By the way, if you try to follow any of the links I listed in that snippet, you'll find that most have disappeared.)

At any rate, I'm sure that SGR's demise is no skin off the backs of any of the Three Amigos. Scientist Bob, after all, is now busily involved in a scheme with Mary Manin Morrissey, selling people advice on how to reposition their boners by using the eleven Universal Laws that were left out of The Secret. Jack "Chicken Soup" Canfield also is involved in dozens of schemes, and Reverend Beckwith is busy as well (and I have to say that of the three, he seems the most sincerely interested in changing the world for the better. But maybe that's just my own projection (and predilection for dreadlocks) speaking). As for all of the poor suckers who got stuck with those two-thousand dollar briefcases and some seriously downscaled dreams, too bad for them, huh? But hey, there's always the next earth-shattering, rip-roaring, life-changing, thunderously exciting affiliate scheme. And there will be many more such schemes, and many more such suckers, some of whom will probably be the very same ones who got hosed in the briefcase deal. There might even be some Madoff and Stanford victims in the mix.

Contrary to popular belief, PT Barnum apparently never said, "There's a sucker born every minute." But someone said it, and that someone was right. An endless supply of suckers is the one thing that all hustledorks, New-Wage or not, can count on, no matter how crappy the economy gets. It's all a matter of finding creative new ways to separate people from their money.

NEWS FLASH added on Wednesday, 4 March: Boys and girls, if you missed your chance to get screwed out of $2,000 for an SGR briefcase, here's your chance to get screwed out of only $297 for the same thing, although I don't think you get a chance to screw other people out of $297 (but I could be wrong). Yes, Bob is selling off his stock right here. Get 'em while they last! (If you watch the video, notice how slick Bob is with his implication that the SGR program he's selling was the basis of The Secret. In reality, Rhonda Byrne was originally inspired by the classic book, The Science of Getting Rich, by Wallace Wattles, which is now in the public domain and easily available for free or cheap.)

Might as well notify the Nobel Prize Committee right now
Finally, speaking of creative money-making ideas, I am thrilled to announce that a brand new branch of science has been created by "Dr." Joe Vitale: neurometaphysics. He announced his discovery in
his March 2 blog post:

I’m a neurometaphysician. I created the new science of neurometaphysics.

I’m a neurometaphysician. I created the field of neurometaphysics. This goes beyond neuroscience, which is the study of how your nervous system affects your life. Neurometaphysics is the science of how your thoughts create your life...

...Note: If you want to hear more about the science of neurometaphysics, leave a comment and tell me so. Meanwhile, please Digg this post and share it with others. Thank you.

And the Joebots are lining up to praise him and find out more about this fascinating new branch of science.

Come to think of it, it might be kind of cool to have a Ph.D. in neurometaphysics. Since it is such a new branch of science, though, I fear that the diploma mills...I mean, online universities...might not have a program in place yet that allows one to buy...I mean earn...a degree in that particular discipline. Joe himself already has a doctorate in metaphysics, but what if he wants to buy a doctorate in neurometaphysics? I guess he'll have to create his own online university with an advanced degree program, and sell the Ph.D. to himself. Maybe he could call his new institution of higher earning the Vitale American Institute of Neurometaphysics, or VAIN. And he could sell "life experience" Bachelors and Masters and Doctoral degrees to tons of other people. Hey, it's another income stream. You don't even have to thank me, Joe.

By the way, there's a guy named Anoop Gupta in Canada who just might take issue with Joe's claim to have invented neurometaphysics. No worries, though; maybe Joe and Anoop can share the Nobel Prize.

Well, that's it for now, Dear Ones. More soon.

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Anonymous hhh said...

Oh good, I was getting bored with Schirmer, he's just an annoying twat. Vitale is a much funnier numpty.

Tuesday, March 03, 2009 5:54:00 AM  
Anonymous HhH said...

Does referring to someone as annoying twat mean I spoil my zen image?
It's a work in progress.

Tuesday, March 03, 2009 1:11:00 PM  
Anonymous mojo said...

I've been kinda vaguely wondering why Mister Stock Market Wizard (that would be Schirmer) will travel halfway across the world for a grand US tour and not once consider going to NYC, which is, like, um, THE financial capital of the world. (I mean, regional pride/snobbery aside, ISN'T it?) At least to have his obligatory Doofus Tourist picture taken in front of the bronze bull statue down in the financial district, or perhaps a photo op of him looking reverently thoughtful and reflective while clutching the fence at Ground Zero. (Assuming the fence is still there--to be honest I haven't had the heart to go down there since it happened, so I don't know.)

But then I thought about it some more and I figured, well, if your primary concern is to gad about impressing people, NYC is the absolute LAST place you'd want to be. For New Yorkers are pretty much NOT "impressible", no matter WHAT their or your social standing may be. It is home to serious, SERIOUS wealth, as well as the quiet, gracious class to not brag about it. (Well, okay, there's Trump, but that's all part of his marketing shtick.) Even among the less financially abundant New Yorkers you're probably better off not talking about what car you drive or how many hot tubs you own. Unless you really WANT to be laughed at in a very rude and insulting way.

I LOVE NYC and New Yorkers, and upon reflection I think it's because they are perhaps the true epitome of the Law of Attraction, TIMES TEN. Meaning, whatever you put out to them, they're going to deliver a MULTIPLE of the same back atcha. If you are reasonably well-intentioned, this is a GOOD thing. Stop a random New Yorker on the street and ask them for directions to, say, a museum or a restaurant, and you will not only get directions, but pointers to at least five other destinations that your anonymous helper will insist are all FAR SUPERIOR to "that touristy piece of crap" you originally mentioned.

So as long as you treat New Yorkers decently, as a general rule they'll treat you EXTRA decently. Treat them not-so-decently, as some people have claimed certain other people have done, and hoo, boy! All bets are off! I wouldn't want to be in the same room with THAT unfortunate person and a pissed off New Yorker or two. As Sid the sloth says in the movie Ice Age, "No thanks--I choose LIFE."

In other news, if one were go to the SGR website as you linked to, and fill in a bogus name and email address, one would be taken to a page where one would be invited to answer a few more generic questions about one's deepest, darkest hopes and dreams about some vague product called "Prodigy"....and then, if one were to fill THAT out with more bogus information, one is promised some sort of generic demo Silva mind program download, provided one was originally smart enough to give them a REAL email address instead of a bogus one.

AND if one was STILL mildly curious what the HELL this "Prodigy" thing was in the first place, and consequently went to the MindValley website itself--www.mindvalley.com--and clicked on the "publishing" link, one would find that, for example, the SGR program netted $2 million dollars worth of products sold in a span of two weeks. Sadly, Proctor's "11 Forgotten Laws" only made "over a quarter of a million", but as they point out, "all from a product that was sitting on Bob Proctor’s shelf until he decided to hand it to MindValley for magical revival."

"Magical Revival". The Universe speaks! There's the book title for that gimmick/scam you keep promising us, Connie! It's got New Age, it's got Magick, and it's got "fire-and-brimstone come-to-Jeebus tent meetin'" written all over it! It's a SIGN, I tells ya! A SIGN!!!

Tuesday, March 03, 2009 1:28:00 PM  
Blogger NorthwestGnome said...

How fun to see Mary Manin Morrissey rear her head in your column today. She defrauded her old church down in Oregon for millions - like at least 10 million.

Just goes to show you just can't keep a newage down - just re-brand and keep talking....

Tuesday, March 03, 2009 2:54:00 PM  
Anonymous Lana said...

Hey! That's what I want my doctorate to be!

"Dr. Lana De La Banana is Chief Neurometaphysician at Mercy Hospital in Phoenix." It does have a nice ring, don't you think?

Oh mercy and heaven help us all.

Tuesday, March 03, 2009 8:04:00 PM  
Anonymous J C said...

Love the lighthearted comments about these hussledorks. I bet they absolutely hate this site. It would offend their egos to think that people actually do think they are just greedy parasites on society.

Tuesday, March 03, 2009 8:30:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Schirmer is boring but if he's heading our way what fun we'll have with Proctor and Schirmer in the same territory. Holy Canoly what a bitch having a...man roll into your territory claiming to know everything when you've just swatted him in court. What I have noticed (after others have cleverly pointed out) is that Schirmers comments about the stock market are always late and after everyone else has had their say. I guess you can always blame everyone else if you are wrong then. All of these guys leave themselves so open to criticism because they say so much stuff that is absolute crap and no matter what way they put it they are just very greedy people. They will always be remembered for the bad stuff they've done because they don't really contribute to society in a real way. What food have they placed on peoples tables or what have they given to needy people? Probably nothing because they stupidly believe that the poor have created their own circumstances. I wonder if they realise that they too have created their own circumstances?

Tuesday, March 03, 2009 10:36:00 PM  
Anonymous HhH said...

Down came an investor to drink at the billabong,
Up jumped the swagman and grabbed him with glee,
And he sang as he shoved that investor in his tucker bag,
"You'll come a-Waltzing Matilda, with me".

Wednesday, March 04, 2009 2:04:00 AM  
Blogger Cosmic Connie said...

HHH: I guess Schirmer is kind of boring for many. I figured you meant "twit" instead of "twat." But heck, neither spoils your zen image. (I do try to keep the language fairly clean around here but I've been a little careless lately.)

Wednesday, March 04, 2009 9:28:00 AM  
Blogger Cosmic Connie said...

Mojo, your second guess was correct: our favorite Aussie is trying to gad about impressing people. He is still doing his stock market shtick, but is trying to get really rich and famous by being a New-Wage hustledork -- albeit a faith-filled Christian New-Wage hustledork. It's kind of hard to market to both the "anything goes" nonjudgmental pseudo-Buddhist New-Wage market AND the born-again, Jesus-is-the-only-way-to-salvation crowd, but he's giving it his best shot. He does seem to have support from his church in Melbourne -- at least they provide a platform for him to do seminars about how to get rich -- but he is definitely still trying to play on his association with The Secret.

And hey, I'm glad you did the research I was too lazy to do about SGR. I found another site where Proctor is apparently selling off the formerly $2,000 briefcases for a mere $297. Heck of a deal! Get 'em while they last!

This is all so inspiring for me. It's making me feel...yes!... magically revived!

Wednesday, March 04, 2009 9:37:00 AM  
Blogger Cosmic Connie said...

Thanks for the input, Northwest Gnome. I'm aware of Mary Morrissey's troubles and mentioned them in my "Ship of Fools" blog post back in 2007.

Supposedly Mary "knew nothing" about what her second ex-husband was doing (and he *did* do prison time), but I have my doubts.

More info here:

As you said, though, you can't keep a newage down. And as I've said before, a shady past -- even if it includes prison -- doesn't put a dent in the earning power of the true masters.

Wednesday, March 04, 2009 9:45:00 AM  
Blogger Cosmic Connie said...

Lana, that title would sound very impressive, except for the "Mercy Hospital" thing. That's sooo Western-medicine-mindset, don't you think? You would do better to affiliate yourself with a "Wellness" Center or a Healthy Lifestyles Institute or something like that. I'd recommend that you start your own Institute if there aren't suitable ones already.

Wednesday, March 04, 2009 9:48:00 AM  
Blogger Cosmic Connie said...

JC, supposedly the hustledorks as well as their followers are too busy basking in the light of their own positivity to be bothered with silly little blogs like this. Why, I bet David Schirmer never even visits Whirled Musings, except to occasionally borrow graphics from it. :-)

Wednesday, March 04, 2009 9:50:00 AM  
Blogger Cosmic Connie said...

LOL, Anon 10:36 PM. I can only imagine Bob Proctor's thoughts about Schirmer trying to horn in on some of Proctor's territory...

As for your question about what good the hustledorks do, that's arguable. Many people claim to have been helped by some of these folks. I don't attempt to argue with that. But many claimed to have been hurt by some of these people too, and that shouldn't be swept under the rug either.

Wednesday, March 04, 2009 9:55:00 AM  
Blogger Cosmic Connie said...

HHH... funny, I was just humming "Waltzing Matilda" to myself yesterday, and then you come up with this little verse. Synchronicity? Or just painfully obvious joke op? Doesn't matter; you have a good start and I think you should finish the song!

Wednesday, March 04, 2009 9:57:00 AM  
Anonymous hHH said...

I know what I am typing, Cosmic Connie, don't you worry your pretty little head. You have the option to do a dirty post with lots of profanity. If you think someone is a complete ****^%$ constantly $£%%^*ing with your ^^***&, tell them to %$%£$ off and *(*&^*& themselves with a ^&^&&y old pitchfork.

I can't quite get my head around the American aversion to swearing on the airwaves. Does hell mean something more than it does here?

Once a jolly swagman camped by a billabong,
Under the shade of a coolibah tree,
And he sang as he watched and waited 'til his billy boiled
"You'll come a-Waltzing Matilda, with me"

Waltzing Matilda, Waltzing Matilda
"You'll come a-Waltzing Matilda, with me"
And he sang as he watched and waited 'til his billy boiled,
"You'll come a-Waltzing Matilda, with me".

Down came a sucker to drink at the billabong,
Up jumped the swagman and grabbed him with glee,
And he sang as he shoved that investor in his tucker bag,
"You'll come a-Waltzing Matilda, with me".

Waltzing Matilda, Waltzing Matilda
"You'll come a-Waltzing Matilda, with me"
And he sang as he shoved that sucker in his tucker bag,
"You'll come a-Waltzing Matilda, with me".

Up rode the squatter, mounted on his thoroughbred,
Down came the troopers, one, two, three,
"Where's that jolly sucker you've got in your tucker bag?"
"You'll come a-Waltzing Matilda, with me".

Waltzing Matilda, Waltzing Matilda
"You'll come a-Waltzing Matilda, with me"
"Where's that jolly investor you've got in your tucker bag?",
"You'll come a-Waltzing Matilda, with me".

Up jumped the swagman and sprang into the billabong,
"You'll never catch me alive", said he,
And his ghost may be heard as you pass by that billabong,
"You'll come a-Waltzing Matilda, with me".

Waltzing Matilda, Waltzing Matilda
"You'll come a-Waltzing Matilda, with me"
And his ghost may be heard as you pass by that billabong,
"You'll come a-Waltzing Matilda, with me."

Wednesday, March 04, 2009 10:11:00 AM  
Blogger Cosmic Connie said...

HHH, I agree that we 'mer'cans are awfully prudish (and hypocritical) when it comes to swearing. I myself have been known to use a colorful word or two in private conversations with friends, but for some reason I feel compelled to exercise a little more decorum on my blog. Maybe that's hypocritical too; I dunno.

At any rate, I laughed out loud at your naughty version of Waltzing Matilda, but, as you'd predicted, I decided not to publish it. Not that I don't appreciate the talent and thought that went into it, though!

Wednesday, March 04, 2009 2:00:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

HhH love your version of waltzing matilda and if ever there is a country whose people can handle having the mickey taken out of them it's Australia. The one you mention here appears a real exception though and probably more to do with a deflated ego but they really are a fabulous bunch.

Wednesday, March 04, 2009 4:30:00 PM  
Anonymous Lana said...

Oh! Good point.

"Dr. Lana De La Banana is Chief Neurometaphysician at Oasis in the Desert Wellness and Longevity Centre in Tucson."

Wednesday, March 04, 2009 11:02:00 PM  
Anonymous HhH said...

There has to be some small island of civility in this awful storm tossed ocean of boorishness and vulgarity.

Wednesday, March 04, 2009 11:39:00 PM  
Anonymous mojo said...

Speaking of impressing people, Dr. Lana's WAY-impressive title reminds me of an episode of the TV show Friends when Phoebe decides to legally change her name to "Princess Consuela Banana-Hammock".

She changed it back when someone finally explained to her what a banana-hammock was.

Thursday, March 05, 2009 2:35:00 PM  
Anonymous Hhh said...

Nice of you to say, anon.

Friday, March 06, 2009 2:03:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hi Connie,

I had a look at Bob's Briefcase offer, such a bargain, how could I not take a look?

I have always previously reserved judgement on the Rev Beckwith, what with him being a man of god and those cute dreadlocks to boot, but his little speech to camera on the brilliantly effective sales page (note the video backdrop and its similarity to 'The Secret' backdrop?) had my stomach churning and heaving. Could have been hunger but I think it was nausea.

At least the Scientist is only after your money, pretty Rev Beckwith wants the whole package--an altogether more sinister scam, imo.
Chilling, he doesn't look quite so pretty to me now.

Friday, March 06, 2009 5:01:00 AM  
Blogger Cosmic Connie said...

Anon 4:30 PM said:
"HhH love your version of waltzing matilda and if ever there is a country whose people can handle having the mickey taken out of them it's Australia."

I pretty much understood that in context but looked it up anyway just to be sure. For the benefit of those who don't know Aussie slang, "taking the mickey out" of someone means to tease or ridicule them. Aussies as a whole do seem to be good sports and great people. I'd love to visit there someday.

There are scads of Aussie slang sites on the Net; here's one of 'em:

Friday, March 06, 2009 3:11:00 PM  
Blogger Cosmic Connie said...

Lana said...

"Dr. Lana De La Banana is Chief Neurometaphysician at Oasis in the Desert Wellness and Longevity Centre in Tucson."

Now, THAT'S impressive.

Friday, March 06, 2009 3:12:00 PM  
Blogger Cosmic Connie said...

HhH said...

"There has to be some small island of civility in this awful storm tossed ocean of boorishness and vulgarity."

No doubt this blog contributes to that boorishness and vulgarity. But I like to delude myself that I occasionally err on the side of civility.

Friday, March 06, 2009 3:17:00 PM  
Blogger Cosmic Connie said...

LOL, Mojo. Let's hope that Dr. Lana doesn't decide to divorce her husband, marry a guy named Hammock and hyphenate.

Friday, March 06, 2009 3:20:00 PM  
Blogger Cosmic Connie said...

Anon 5:01 AM: Y'know, you're right. I've never really snarked much about Rev. Beckwith, other than to occasionally call him "Zormak," after Steve Salerno's Nov. 2006 SHAMblog post describing Beckwith as a "surreally weird" guy "who, in dress, speech, mannerisms and overall demeanor looked as if his birth-name might really be Zormak From The Planet Woosabi-6."


I always sort of liked the idea of Beckwith's multicultural Agape Spiritual Center and all that, and I still do. On the other hand, I have to remember that he has been, after all, part of the SGR scam. Although he backed out in the beginning, as I mentioned in my blog post, he returned. And now here he is on Scientist Bob's Bargain Briefcase Page, using all of his powers of persuasion, as well as every hand gesture known to humanity, to get people to buy that load of cheap crap.

Creepy, really.

Friday, March 06, 2009 3:35:00 PM  
Blogger Cosmic Connie said...

BTW, here's some more Schirmer news (for those who aren't, like, totally bored with this stuff).

First off, Schirmer has come and gone from Austin, Texas, which is as close to my neck of the woods as he got on his trip. Judging from his Twitter page he met with a couple of Internet marketers in Austin, Perry Belcher and Ryan Deiss.

I Googled Perry Belcher and this was one of the top results, after all of his
sponsored links:

What better person for Schirmer to consider as a marketing partner than someone who has also been in real trouble with the authorities? I suppose that the two of them can
explore ways to either (1) further paint Schirmer as a hapless victim of unfair witch hunts; or (2) further sweep Schirmer's problems under the rug.

Belcher, whose escapades remind me somewhat of Kevin Trudeau, though on a smaller scale, apparently relocated recently from Memphis, Tennessee to Austin. Whether or not this was due to his legal problems I don't know.

Ryan Deiss, the other person Schirmer met with in Austin, is a good friend and supporter
of Belcher's and has publicly defended him against people who complain about Belcher's
marketing practices.

What names... Belcher and Deiss (which is pronounced like "Dice)." If nothing else, I'd say the Universe has a sense of humor.

When I found out that David Schirmer was headed to Austin my first thought was that he might be trying to meet with Joe Vitale, who lives in that area.

I thought this because Schirmer has been playing so heavily on his association with "The Secret," even though it seems that most of the other "Secret" teachers do not want anything to do with him. I wondered, however, if Joe V would decide to go against the tide and meet with him. After all, Joe has met and befriended a man who is arguably a far bigger scammer than Schirmer, the aforementioned infomercial fraudster Kevin Trudeau. In a recent blog post Joe just glossed over Trudeau's troubles and wrote about the benefits of "unconditional forgiveness."

However, I saw no mention on David Schirmer's Twitter page or on his blog about a meeting with Joe, and I know that if he had met with Mr. Fire he would have shouted it from the rooftops.

Of course Joe and all of the other "Secret" teachers have pretty much been silent regarding Schirmer's troubles; I imagine that's from a combination of professional courtesy (such as it is) and the desire to focus on the positive. Occasionally, though, one of the princes of positivity will get a teensy bit snarky, as it looks like Joe recently did regarding Schirmer.

As many know, Schirmer is promoting himself these days as "the car park guy in The Secret." Joe seems less than impressed with that accomplishment. A little over a week ago he sent this piece promoting his attractanewcar.com site to his email list:


From: Joe Vitale
Date: Thu, Feb 26, 2009
Subject: Ready to escape LOA kindergarden [sic]?

A lot of people learn the law of attraction (LOA) and use it to attract parking places.

I think that's fine for a kindergarden [sic] approach
to co-creating your own reality, but wouldn't it be smarter and more fun to actually attract
a *car* to park someplace?


Me-ow! Well, if Schirmer can't get in good with the New-Wage gurus, he can always take refuge in his Faith-Filled, Bible-Believing Christian shtick. It always helps to have more than one iron in the fire.

And one more bit of trivia: According to his Twitter page, David Schirmer has apparently opened up a bank account at a Bank of America in Atlanta.

Just another bidness venture, or the herald of a relocation? Or did he perhaps run into a nice Nigerian businessman who talked him into opening a joint account? I'm sure he'll share more details soon...

Friday, March 06, 2009 4:20:00 PM  
Anonymous Lana said...

Too funny! One of my friends actually called me Princess Lana Banana today!

I had to google banana-hammock. Ain't no way I'm divorcing my husband now!

Friday, March 06, 2009 5:58:00 PM  
Anonymous Lana said...

I'll give Austin some time to air out before I visit.

BTW, Perry Belcher started to follow me on Twitter. During my experiment of following almost everyone back, I followed him. Then I checked out his site and unfollowed. Just don't get what the draw is.

Friday, March 06, 2009 6:04:00 PM  
Blogger Cosmic Connie said...

I had to Google banana hammock too, because I hadn't seen that episode of "Friends" (there are some serious gaps in my cultural education).

Friday, March 06, 2009 6:10:00 PM  
Blogger Cosmic Connie said...

And in related news... in my junior-high Spanish classes we all had to use fake Spanish names, and mine, of course, was Consuela.

Friday, March 06, 2009 6:11:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

A snippet from wikipedia:

Beckwith is married to Ricki Byars-Beckwith, a singer, composer, and leader of Agape International Spiritual Center choir. Their marriage ceremony was performed by Mary Manin Morrissey. (who is also a New Thought Minister)

The mutual back-scratching seems clearer, or is that murkier?

Friday, March 06, 2009 6:24:00 PM  
Anonymous Lana said...

Mine was Elena.

"Lana" means wool and is also slang for money. Always got funny looks in Spain :-)

Hmmm. I am pretty good at attracting beautiful wool sweaters. But where's my money?!

Friday, March 06, 2009 6:39:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

It seems that this guy has found one of his own in America and didn't take long did it. For a man who claims to be a faith walking christian he sure knows how to put himself above everyone else. I am absolutely disgusted at how he talks down to peopleand I think he deserves whatever he gets because he seems so arrogant. If he thought the ozzies didn't like his attitude then he probably won't like how he'll be treated here. The sooner he starts living and talking like a christian the sooner his life will improve instead of claiming being a christian and acting and talking like a tramp.

Saturday, March 07, 2009 5:33:00 PM  
Blogger Cosmic Connie said...

Lana (6:04 PM) wrote:
"BTW, Perry Belcher started to follow me on Twitter. During my experiment of following almost everyone back, I followed him. Then I checked out his site and unfollowed. Just don't get what the draw is."

Lana, from my perspective as a definite Internet marketing outsider, I can only guess that Belcher appeals mainly to the some of the more testosterone-infused factions of the wild and woolly IM industry. Like many in that line of work (or should I say that line of work-shirking), he seems to be mostly bluster with perhaps a little bit of substance. Besides revealing "secrets" about social networking, his shtick appears to involve bragging in a huge way about his incredible, astounding success at driving traffic to his sites and making jillions of dollars as a result. Needless to say, he is selling his secrets for top dollar to other Internet jillionaire wannabes.

He is far from alone in this, of course; in both style and substance, he seems to be drawing straight from the IM maverick/rogue/rebel playbook. (As for those style guidelines, they appear to be rather simple and straightforward: The cruder and brasher, the better.)

Well, I guess it plays well at StomperNet Live, where Belcher was one of the speakers this weekend in Atlanta. Apparently David Schirmer and his eager young Jason-Alexander-lookalike sidekick Ben also attended. I can only imagine the jocularity and back-slapping and hustledorking that's been going on there. Ugh. (As a matter of fact, StomperNet (which, I understand, has a membership fee of nearly $800 a MONTH), seems to be mainly a man's world, as is IM in general, although some would disagree.
http://www.clicknewz.com/1735/stompernet-women-respond/ )

I have a feeling that, just as in the selfish-help/New-Wage industry, most of the money in IM is being made by a very few people who make THEIR money by (1) selling other people their expensive advice on how to make money; (2) cooking up all sorts of MLM and affiliate schemes; and (3) sneakily signing up as many poor saps as possible for automatic payment arrangements that are all but impossible for the poor saps to get out of. Number 3 has been one of the main consumer complaints against both Kevin Trudeau and Perry Belcher.

Again, keep in mind that I know very little about the Internet marketing world and am only going by my own observations and gut feelings -- although I have a feeling some will read my comments and roll their eyes at my penchant for stating the obvious.

As for Belcher, he has more than his share of detractors, including a fellow who goes by the name of SaltyDroid. Now, whether Salty is merely a rival of Belcher's or is one of many who claimed to have been screwed in one way or another by him, I couldn't say. I haven't asked him and am too lazy to do any actual research. But Salty has been on Belcher's case all weekend, and has even had some interesting conversations with Schirmer. Let the name-calling begin:

BTW, I found it interesting that in the discussion on the Mike Young Law blog post I linked to in my earlier comment, Belcher's defenders were either denying the allegations altogether, or were telling people who claimed to have lost many thousands of dollars to Belcher to just move on and get over it.

That's right... sweep it under the rug. Yep, Belcher and Schirmer seem to be a match made in heaven.

Sunday, March 08, 2009 3:03:00 PM  
Blogger Cosmic Connie said...

Anon 6:24 PM wrote:
A snippet from wikipedia:

"Beckwith is married to Ricki Byars-Beckwith, a singer, composer, and leader of Agape International Spiritual Center choir. Their marriage ceremony was performed by Mary Manin Morrissey. (who is also a New Thought Minister)

"The mutual back-scratching seems clearer, or is that murkier?"

All I can say is, Amen.

Sunday, March 08, 2009 3:07:00 PM  
Blogger Cosmic Connie said...

Lana 6:39 PM said:
"Hmmm. I am pretty good at attracting beautiful wool sweaters. But where's my money?!"

Maybe you need to join StomperNet and learn how to seriously sucker other people out of money!

Sunday, March 08, 2009 3:09:00 PM  
Blogger Cosmic Connie said...

Anonymous 5:33 PM said...

"It seems that this guy [Schirmer] has found one of his own in America and didn't take long did it. For a man who claims to be a faith walking christian he sure knows how to put himself above everyone else..."

He doesn't seem to perceive what he's doing as putting himself above everyone else. From his perspective, he is just humbly sharing his wisdom for the good of humanity.

Rolling my eyes...

Sunday, March 08, 2009 3:11:00 PM  
Anonymous Nima said...

hey I love the fact that people from almost all of the world visit this blog, and we're have some good time here. To me it's all about how much energy we put out. For instance although I know Connie is an amazing writer( and I have to stop before she starts disliking me for praising her, J ! ) she still puts some good energy into writing her posts and probably sacrifice here and there.
My point is that Regardless of What I do (immoral , unethical ..) as long as I put good energy into it, people will get gravitated toward it. Even if my work seems to be ill intended, so long I do my job with all I can give, my work will be respected by some people, which then leads to its success. It’s about how I do rather than what I do.
So Is the Work of Schimer any less valuable than that of Connie’s? Aren't you both good at what you do? So isn’t it why people get attracted to your work?
My feeling is that there are people who think of schimer very negative and, label him badly. And I’m not a fan of that. If the man has the motive to make the money from what he’s good at then who am I to label him for what I believe is wrong? If anything it’s up to individuals and attendants to be cynical and skeptical of the materials and the logic.
Anyway it’s my 2 cents. I enjoyed reading some the comments about banana hammock. Evidently banana hammock is not used only to describe the hook for the bananas! Thank you mojo for the piece about NYC. I will remember that once I go there, although being from LA I anticipate some similarities in that regard. And hhh get over yourself man !!

Sunday, March 08, 2009 9:21:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

If David Schirmer really is a christian then why does he fight everyone who disagrees with him or says they dont like what he is doing or saying?

Typical hustledork - One rule for them and one for you! I think he is one guy to seriously follow because I don't trust him.

Monday, March 09, 2009 7:21:00 AM  
Blogger RevRon's Rants said...

"So Is the Work of Schimer any less valuable than that of Connie’s? Aren't you both good at what you do?"

Dr. Michael Debakey was apparently quite proficient at what he did.It should be noted, however, that Dr. Josef Mengele was also quite skilled. Even had their levels of skill been equivalent, I would question the values of anyone who found their works to be of equal value.

While the Newage hustledorks don't seem to have actually killed anyone, we should ask them - and ourselves - how many people have been truly enriched by them, and how many have merely been fleeced. The difficult part is that so many who have failed to achieve the desired results actually buy the hucksters' claims that failure can only be the result of not following their routines, not being "evolved" enough (always pointed out with love, of course), or not having bought some necessary prerequisite product. If you doubt this, just check out "Dr." Vitale's blog, and see how he deflects critics (when he publishes their critiques at all, that is).

"So isn’t it why people get attracted to your work?"

I think most people are attracted to Connie's Whirled because they need someone to intellectually pinch them and let them know that it isn't just a bizarre dream... that there really *are* people who are stupid or desperate enough to believe things that common sense tells them are absurd.

Monday, March 09, 2009 8:03:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Had a cruise by Salty Droid's blog.
Very jolly. The Droid gives "free hate", an even better bargain than Bob's Briefcase.

Monday, March 09, 2009 10:28:00 AM  
Blogger Cosmic Connie said...

Thank you for your comments, Nima; I always appreciate your input. I think Ron's response is great too, but I wanted to add that you have touched on an essential question we all have to ask ourselves when evaluating the merits of something (or someone). We look at results, which are often subjective, but most of us at some level base our judgments on the intentions, or what we perceive to be the intentions, of the person whose work or words we are evaluating.

This, of course, puts us in danger of resorting to those infamous "ad hominem" attacks, and that's always a mistake in formal debate or other forums where cool logic should prevail. But Whirled Musings is not a place for cool logic, and while I try to avoid gratuitous snarking or vicious personal attacks, some of my snarking is very much based on what I perceive to be the motives and intentions of my targets.

I do not pretend to know unequivocally what is in the hearts and minds of the people I snark about, nor do I pretend to have the most objective outlook about the results of their work. (I will, however, point out factual errors, inconsistencies, or downright lies when I see them.) In the matter of David Schirmer, I have seen an abundance of evidence that neither his intentions nor the results he reaps are benign. I do not mean to suggest that he is evil incarnate, and I am sure that like everyone else he has his good qualities and maybe even some good intentions, but it does appear to me that he (like most New-Wage hustlers) is selfish, narcissistic, and more focused on earning money and fame than on anything else. Again, that's my observation, based upon the evidence I've seen.

I hasten to add (as I've done numerous times before on these forums) that I see nothing intrinsically evil in the pursuit of money or the longing for a better life. And I do not delude myself that there is anything noble about poverty, which itself is the breeding ground of many evils. However, I think it *is* evil to earn money or achieve one's "better life" by stepping on other people, as Mr. Schirmer is alleged to have done over and over again.

You ask, "If the man has the motive to make the money from what he’s good at then who am I to label him for what I believe is wrong?" And all I can say to that is...well, see the paragraph above.

Monday, March 09, 2009 2:30:00 PM  
Blogger Cosmic Connie said...

Anon 7:21 AM said...

"If David Schirmer really is a christian then why does he fight everyone who disagrees with him or says they dont like what he is doing or saying?"

Good question. Apparently he fights them not just with words, but with legal intimidation and in some cases lawsuits. The man is no stranger to a courtroom.

Don't get me wrong. There's nothing un-Christian about trying to defend yourself against false accusations. The big question, though, is whether or not the many accusations against Schirmer ARE false. He says yes, of course; many others say no.

Monday, March 09, 2009 2:34:00 PM  
Blogger Cosmic Connie said...

Ron, thank you for your response to Nima. I only wish that "intellectually pinching" people were as lucrative as blowing New-Wage smoke up their patoots. :-)

Monday, March 09, 2009 2:36:00 PM  
Blogger Cosmic Connie said...

Anon 10:28 AM wrote:

"Had a cruise by Salty Droid's blog.
Very jolly. The Droid gives 'free hate', an even better bargain than Bob's Briefcase."

Yes, the Droid does have his own style; a little goes a long way. But I did think his Tweet exchange with David Schirmer was noteworthy.

Monday, March 09, 2009 2:39:00 PM  
Anonymous S Dunn said...

These people especially that aussie guy is acting like a girl. They should stop whinging an running to mommy every time someone says something they don't like. They are pathetic and frankly their ability at retaining relationships freaks me out.

Monday, March 09, 2009 5:49:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Magical Revival is what David Schirmer is now attempting on us Americans. You watch we are going to have a glossy fresh package to the same crap and we are also going to have a global launch, he has already warned us. OMG, hang onto your knickers cause this is going to get well as big as a mans ego anyway.

If the guy is going to use that money to finally pay his debts like he promised then I've got a feeling that he might be well received in the US but if he doesn't God help him here. I hope he finally pays his debts whatever that is and probably some interest or hurt money would sweeten things up a bit and then I reckon he might do ok. That is of course if he hasn't spent it all before he's actually made it like most of these jerks do. I think their ego is often so big that they don't even fit into it but thats my opinion. I hope he has the commonsense not to fight and just get on with it and accept that what is needed is a bit of recompense for being such an ass.

Monday, March 09, 2009 7:31:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Connie what these people do not realise and have not factored into their get rich quick schemes is the fact that 99.9% of the people out there want to quietly achieve their millions not make an enormous global launch about it. What they have realised is that by keeping quiet they get to enjoy their rewards in total freedom. What these guys get is shit day after day after day because they have asked for it. If you gave any one of them $10million i bet they would slink away into the sunset because that is the type of person they are. I believe that they have to make so much noise to make any money because they don't know how to honestly or any other way. We get to laugh at them and let it all out at their expense because thats what they are asking for. If they don't like the rewards do be so freakin obnoxious, arrogant and egotistical.

Tuesday, March 10, 2009 12:18:00 AM  
Blogger Cosmic Connie said...

Someone directed me to a Twitter conversation (of sorts) between David Schirmer and a guy named Thubten (yes, really).

Thubten, apparently in response to something Schirmer had written, Tweeted: “Exactly, @davidschirmer! I watched The Secret w/Abraham >100x & my life turned around. I am so grateful. And I always get great parking.”

(Of course, Joe "Mr. Fire" Vitale would say that using the LOA to get parking spaces is mere kindergarten-level LOA usage.)

The person who pointed me to the Schirmer/Thubten conversation said, "I do like this comment though: 'There's no such thing as net-play marketing, or net-sit marketing. It's called net-WORK marketing for a reason.'"

Actually, Thubten was re-Tweeting from a guy who goes by the name MLM_Success.

My correspondent also wondered who Schirmer was trying to fool by pretending he is merely on Twitter for some lofty, abstract purpose such as building relationships -- when in reality he's poised to do an international product launch.

Well, to be fair, many people on Twitter have an agenda. (Not me; I'm just there for fun. But then again, social-media experts would say I'm under-utilizing Twitter.) Besides, what better time to "build relationships" than when you're trying to launch a product?

Anyway, I looked at Thubten's Twitter page and went to his web site. He bills himself as the "4-Hour Guru," taking his inspiration, of course, from that bestselling bible of the younger generation of hustledorks, "The Four Hour Work Week" by Timothy Ferriss. So even though Thub felt inspired to quote the MLM person about the fact you have to WORK at network marketing in order for it to work for you, it seems to me that he has bought into, and is trying to sell, the "sit on your ass and become rich and happy" philosophy.

[Thub also says he's a former Buddhist monk, by the way. My guy Ron, who lived in a Buddhist temple many years ago and came close to taking the vows himself, wonders which temple Thub monked at. I can't seem to find that info on Thub's site.]

In any case, Thub doesn't seem to know or care about Schirmer's "troubles." Actually, however, I would be very surprised to find someone of Thub's ilk who would believe or particularly care about those troubles, unless, of course, *he* was the one potentially being screwed over.

There are days when the whole social-media milieu, and the Internet marketing world at large, look to me like a combination of the Gold Rush and a drunken frat-boy party, with a large dose of New-Wage magical thinking thrown in. In such an environment, who's going to bother with looking into some spruiker's background, especially when there is potentially gobs of money to be made?

Not that there's anything intrinsically wrong with making money, as I noted in a comment above -- not even obscene amounts of it. What matters, or should matter, is *how* you make it, and if you do it by screwing other people over, shame on you. I also have to say again that I am pretty naive about Internet marketing as a whole, and maybe some of my comments reflect that naivete. I'm always willing to learn, and I suspect that I could benefit from some of the marketing tips offered by some online gurus. I simply don't want to get involved in anything smarmy, and there seems to be smarm aplenty online.

As for Twitter, I've had my share of fun there myself, but it can be a dreadful time sucker if you really get into it. Twitter, as more than one person has noted, is like a big party (I actually agree with Schirmer's new pal Perry Belcher on that one), and I would imagine that to get the best use of it you have to engage others in some way. Twitter and other social media are indeed primarily about building relationships, not about pushing your product in people's faces with every Tweet or post or entry. (Nor is it about boring the masses to tears with your anguished self-talk about whether to have a plain or blueberry bagel for breakfast.)

However, it seems to me that for David Schirmer, despite what he may say, Twitter is just one more outlet for drawing more attention
to himself and whatever product he's launching (or trying to dump). He's hardly alone in that, of course.

Moreover, as I mentioned in my "Mini-Madoff" post, he has found an unparalleled level of acceptance on Twitter. People actually praise him and call him an amazing teacher, and their praise is there for all the world to see. It's better in a way than the testimonials he has on his web sites, because you can always fake a testimonial. But to have other real people telling you how wonderful you are, and having the whole Twitterverse able to see it...what a rush it must be for him.

As I've previously noted, it's a whole new platform for Schirmer, one in which his past troubles just seem to have melted away, with the notable exception of the occasional detractor. But he just swats those pests out of the way and carries on. And the naive new followers continue to praise his name.

Meanwhile, back home in the real world, the people he has allegedly wronged continue to stew.

It just doesn't seem right somehow.

Tuesday, March 10, 2009 5:03:00 PM  
Blogger Cosmic Connie said...

And I just found out about another loyal David Schirmer fan:

He is very young. And very, very naive. And I am very, very sorry if I sound patronizing, but REALLY. Some people just make you want to protect them from themselves.

But that's beyond the scope of my duties here.

Tuesday, March 10, 2009 5:16:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Good comments connie, get with the program I say and beat them at the games they play.

Tuesday, March 10, 2009 5:35:00 PM  
Anonymous Denise said...

Why is it that the people most challenged with maintaining good relationships are the ones who tell the world they are the experts. That David Schirmer guy is on Twitter Twittering away about love and relationships. You've got to wonder how challenged the guy is when he has no qualifications at all to talk about such things in an authoritative way.

He keeps crapping on about the same things all the time. Life this: The emotions of hate, revenge, anger and fear are ALWAYS destructive, never creative for any person. Yet he is the the one who is fighting back all the time on his twitter and everywhere else too by the looks of it. The guy has serious anger issues he needs to deal with but I bet he comes across as gods gift of pure charm. They are the ones you look out for.

Tuesday, March 10, 2009 10:55:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Anyone associated with someone who calls his business Mongrel and who has been exposed here for stealing from the innocent explains exactly what David Schirmers intentions for coming to the US of A is. His association with Belcher tells me everything I need to know about the guy without anyone saying a thing. He must know Belchers story and is choosing to be ignorant. By making that choice he has placed himself at the same level as Belcher...

Wednesday, March 11, 2009 10:40:00 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Well Connie, it looks like David Schirmer and probably his mates too are on their way back home after their marketing twitfest, which of course is not about making obscene profits off the gullible; it's all about building successful relationships (ahem...) How stupid do they think we Americans are? I bet 99% of the gullible who buy into their rubbish are poor and it is not because they haven't got off their backsides it is because they are getting suckered into things like this. I hope that Mr Schirmer returns homes and makes good on his promises to all those people in Australia. I also hope that he has learned his lesson about how not to do business. What I don't think he has learned is how to be an honest Cristian (there is one isn't there?). I find it obscene that he is claiming to be a christian and aligning himself with someone like Perry Belcher. I along with many of my friends are frankly disgusted in him and we don't mind who we tell. If Mr Schirmer thinks he has learned from the best in Perry Belcher then I say God help us all in the future. I find it very sad that people have to stoop to such low levels and expose their true parasitic greedy selves just to make a buck and have a life. Mr Schirmer has lost my respect, as have Belcher and many others.

Wednesday, March 11, 2009 10:43:00 AM  
Anonymous Qld Dude said...

David Schirmer encourages everyone to discard the bad and only focus on the good that they desire. I have taken his advice and thrown every thing with his name, face or comments on it and life could not be better. Thanks for the advice Dave!

Wednesday, March 11, 2009 5:11:00 PM  
Anonymous Lana said...

I agree with your observations about Internet marketing. It's filled with rotten apples and snake-oil salesmen. They don't care one bit about providing value. All they want is to get your money.

I used to think they were making a big dent in e-commerce, but I'm not so sure now. Most people haven't heard of them. And most "mainstream" Web marketers that I've talked with don't know who they are either. That makes me feel a little better!

Thursday, March 12, 2009 8:16:00 PM  
Blogger Salty Droid said...

Ms. Connie :: For the Record

The Droid is not a rival of Belcher's :: Nor have I been screwed by him {literally or figuratively}

I've also never lost anything to ShitHead Schirmer or anyone else I blog about.

I'm a neutral. These idiots have set up in an open forum where they are vulnerable to attack ... I'm just obliging.

Rock on! >>bleep

Friday, May 08, 2009 2:33:00 AM  
Blogger Cosmic Connie said...

Thank you for clarifying, Droid. I already agreed with your observations, but your statement of neutrality re your targets makes you even more credible in my book.

Carry on!

Friday, May 08, 2009 10:39:00 AM  

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