Whirled Musings

Across the Universe with Cosmic Connie, aka Connie L. Schmidt...or maybe just through the dung-filled streets and murky swamps of pop culture -- more specifically, the New-Age/New-Wage crowd, pop spirituality & religion, pop psychology, self(ish)-help, business babble, media silliness, & related (or occasionally unrelated) matters of consequence. Hope you're wearing boots. (By the way, the "Cosmic" bit in my moniker is IRONIC.)

Thursday, October 16, 2008

Imaginary friends to the rescue

So you say you're still uneasy about the world financial crisis, despite the fact that Joe Vitale now has a Rolls Royce? Boy, you're a hard case, aren't you? Well, relief is on the way.


Esther and Jerry Hicks, the George and Gracie of the New-Wage world, and the real inspiration behind The Secret, have once again called upon their imaginary buds, a group of disembodied entities collectively known as "Abraham." Earlier this month Abe spilled the beans about the crazy money stuff that's going on today, and also shared some wise words about the US presidential election and that whole politix thing.

Here's the vid.

Be sure to look at the faces of the audience – believers every one (well, most of 'em, anyway; one guy looked kind of skeptical). I will concede that some of the advice Esther...er...I mean Abe...gives about personal responsibility is good enough advice, but you could find the same thing on any Libertarian blog. You don't have to pay to go and listen to Esther repeat what the voices in her head tell her.

Lest you think the Hicks' audience is restricted to just a few fringe loonies, you should know that Esther and Jerry are among the richest folks working in the New-Wage industry today. So a lot of people are buying their stuff and going to their workshops. How rich are they? Well, really, really rich. Here's more info about them and the way they work.

And by the way, in case you were thinking of going on the Abraham-Hicks 2009 cruise to Tahiti, I regret to inform you that it's sold out. (Look at the cabin prices. And it's sold out. Does that give you an idea of the kind of money that's floating around in New-Wage paradise?) But don't worry; the Hicks host several cruises each year.


As Esther and Jerry themselves put it, "We keep saying this----It just can't get any better than this! (But we know that somehow it will!)."

I gotta find me a scam.

PS ~ If you're considering going into the imaginary-friends business yourself, there are a few important points you should consider. Fortunately, I have just the old blog post for you. (Hey, I'm not rich myself (yet), but I can give really good useless advice on how you can get rich. No, you don't have to thank me. Well, okay. Thank me.)

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18 Comments:

Anonymous yakaru said...

Holy crap, the law of attraction with compound interest!

Thursday, October 16, 2008 4:23:00 PM  
Blogger Cosmic Connie said...

Well, I guess that's how the Universe works!

Thursday, October 16, 2008 4:36:00 PM  
Anonymous HHH said...

'Chill out and go to work'?
Somehow I expect more from the ascended ones.

Thursday, October 16, 2008 5:48:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

For Christs sake how stupid are people? For sure that is why the likes of that Aussie guy are milking the system for all its worth. One small problem, you don't hear of Esther and Jerry owing anyone money or having extra lunch on the side or failing to follow up on committments and promises they have made to the public. Why, my guess is because they really have made some dosh from the flocks. I do think it sad when people will pay for happy pills in the form of a feel good seminars to give them a high in life. I also wonder what sort of relationships the likes of these new age hustledorks have with their families because they need to fill their egos with the flock loving them. Quite sad really and it will all come to an end soon enough. Just as soon as the public get sick of throwing money to the wind and watching the hustledorks brag about what they are buying and doing with their hard earns dosh.

Thursday, October 16, 2008 5:48:00 PM  
Anonymous hhh said...

Yeah, I'm sic of these new wagers. Someone like Schirmer is such a debaser, Hey, I'd like to unleash a gigantic wave of mutilation on the lot of them. I'm amazed at how they just wander all over the world messing with folks heads till they're wondering,'where is my mind'. And that woman who channels abraham, is she wierd, or what?

Thursday, October 16, 2008 7:47:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

For what it's worth: a Rolls-Royce Phantom isn't all that much of a status symbol... UNLESS you have a chauffeur to go with it... and separate housing for the chauffeur... and a nice garage for the Phantom with lamb's wool carpet to park it on. (No joke! I've seen this happen.)

Myself, I'm happy with my 2008 Bentley Arnauge Limosine - with the driver - and for personal enjoyment, a 2008 Bentley Continental.

But hey! It all took something that a lot of New Wagers aren't telling: ACTION. And most people are simply too lazy to get off their butts and do anything. They want the government to come bail their stupid A@@e@ out of a jam when they listen to to nonsense of these "entities."

Friday, October 17, 2008 7:24:00 AM  
Anonymous Lana said...

I could channel the A-Group soooo easily!

I haven't been to an A-H event, but I have been around their believers. They're all highly intelligent. So it blows me away how gullible they are.

Well, I'm off to go find a killer surfboard to ride the wave -- just in case.

Saturday, October 18, 2008 11:20:00 AM  
Blogger Cosmic Connie said...

HHH said...

"'Chill out and go to work'?
Somehow I expect more from the ascended ones."

I guess Abe changes with the times. Cool, hip sound bites are the way to go now.

Not too long ago, Abe had a dreadful foreign accent, then they/it had kind of a robotic voice, and now Abe sounds remarkably like Esther.

Or maybe there really *is* a group of entities with different voices and accents, and they're just taking turns. Or maybe Esther was tired of wags like me making fun of her dreadful accent. Who knows? The Universe works in mysterious ways.

Saturday, October 18, 2008 1:30:00 PM  
Blogger Cosmic Connie said...

Anonymous said...

"For Christs sake how stupid are people?"

Anon, you are asking the wrong question. The right question is this: "How can I get stupid people to give me their money?"

The Hicks have obviously found a really, really good answer to that question.

Saturday, October 18, 2008 1:33:00 PM  
Blogger Cosmic Connie said...

HHH wrote:

"And that woman who channels abraham, is she wierd, or what?"

Not at all, HHH. She and her former Amway salesman/circus performer/musician/comedian husband Jerry) are simply tapping into a gullible market. They invented...er...discovered Abraham after Jerry had read the Seth books, and the two of them consulted a local spirit medium who claimed to channel an entity named Theo. I think they both came to the conclusion that an imaginary friend of their own could prove to be a profitable enterprise. Boy, were they right.

They claim they weren't in it for the money, and I do think that on one level they are surprised by their success. But as I said, they know EXACTLY what they're doing.

Saturday, October 18, 2008 1:51:00 PM  
Blogger Cosmic Connie said...

Anonymous 7:24 AM said...

"For what it's worth: a Rolls-Royce Phantom isn't all that much of a status symbol... UNLESS you have a chauffeur to go with it... and separate housing for the chauffeur... and a nice garage for the Phantom with lamb's wool carpet to park it on. (No joke! I've seen this happen.)"

Well, I'm sure that Joe will manage to find a driver, and he's already looking for a mansion befitting his latest status symbol. Perhaps it will have suitable chauffeur's quarters too. The Rolls may not be the ultimate status symbol -- particularly in light of the fact that he feels such a need to boast about it, and also that he apparently needs to conduct $5,000.00-a-head MasterMind sessions in it -- but it is enough of a symbol to get the Joebots drooling. And that translates to more money into his pocket.

Anon also wrote:

"Myself, I'm happy with my 2008 Bentley Arnauge Limosine - with the driver - and for personal enjoyment, a 2008 Bentley Continental."

The Bentley Arnage...now, that's a car with real leg room in the back seat. So you're a Bentley man, eh? You kind of remind me of a person that Joe has praised a few times on his blog... Well, your secret is safe with me. ;-)

Anon also wrote:

"But hey! It all took something that a lot of New Wagers aren't telling: ACTION. And most people are simply too lazy to get off their butts and do anything. They want the government to come bail their stupid A@@e@ out of a jam when they listen to to nonsense of these 'entities.'"

Amen to the laziness bit. But I don't think that the Abe fans, or the vast majority of Law of Attraction believers, are the ones who are benefiting from the latest bailout efforts. In fact, most of the LOA-noids don't seem to be putting their faith in the government. Instead they're relying on the Universe, which has become the New-Wage equivalent of the deus ex machina.

On a fairly regular basis, Joe himself pops up with a disclaimer about how making the LOA work in your favor requires "inspired action" in addition to the mental exercises (the wishing and hoping and intending and stuff like that). Yet his marketing efforts almost completely focus on the implied "magic" in the process. And who can forget his immortal lines in 'The Secret,' in which he likens the Universe to a mail-order catalog whose pages you can just flip through, picking and choosing what you want, and you'll receive it. "It's really that easy!"

New-Wagers and politicians... they're all alike. They say what they think people want to hear. And in an effort to pander to the widest audience possible, they can express two completely contradictory views at the same time without blinking an eye.

Saturday, October 18, 2008 2:55:00 PM  
Blogger Cosmic Connie said...

Lana wrote:

"I haven't been to an A-H event, but I have been around their believers. They're all highly intelligent. So it blows me away how gullible they are."

Well, then, I guess I misspoke (or mis-wrote) when I called them "stupid." I guess there's a difference between stupidity and gullibility/willful suspension of disbelief. In any case, it seems clear that the Abe followers have a LOT of money to blow, which is why I should probably be shopping for one of those killer surfboards too. :-)

Saturday, October 18, 2008 2:59:00 PM  
Anonymous HHH said...

I think it's awful how with some people, it's just money, money, money. Living in the world we live in though, it seems that that's just the name of the game, and it seems to me that when all is said and done, some people are more than willing to be living in a dream world. These new-wagers can sell dreams for so long because they can say take a chance on me and I'll make you as good as new- and people go for it! The scam circus just seems to go on and on and on, and I'd like to say that the punter is the piper who calls the tune in that segmant of society, but it just seems like the winner takes it all in the exploitive new age.

Saturday, October 18, 2008 4:26:00 PM  
Anonymous HHH said...

You want to hang ten on a wave of mutilation, Lana?
http://tiny.cc/WseJa

Saturday, October 18, 2008 4:44:00 PM  
Anonymous Lana said...

They have money. They're smart. Look at Oprah, for heaven's sake! (scratching head)

HHH, Thanks for the exciting offer, but I'll have to pass. I'm still practicing in the kiddie pool.

Saturday, October 18, 2008 7:39:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

You'll find me a scam downunder.

Sunday, October 19, 2008 5:26:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

What gets me more pissed off than anything is when these people start preaching their Christianity to everyone when it is very clear that a real Christian doesn't have to say a thing. ACTION not WORDS is what matters and you see very little of it in these people. They are full of words and pretty shallow ones at that. I mean how offensive is it that David Schirmer claims he is a faith walking christian when he has been charged in court with misleading an deceptive conduct. Oh but he has a disclaimer doesn't he, he claims to have found faith? Pathetic.

Sunday, October 19, 2008 5:32:00 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Surf's up, Lana.
Some inspiRATion.

http://tinyurl.com/5axmxg

Sunday, October 19, 2008 9:55:00 PM  

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