Whirled Musings

Across the Universe with Cosmic Connie, aka Connie L. Schmidt...or maybe just through the dung-filled streets and murky swamps of pop culture -- more specifically, the New-Age/New-Wage crowd, pop spirituality & religion, pop psychology, self(ish)-help, business babble, media silliness, & related (or occasionally unrelated) matters of consequence. Hope you're wearing boots. (By the way, the "Cosmic" bit in my moniker is IRONIC.)

Friday, December 15, 2006

Magic is afoot

No doubt you’ve been reading some pretty strange things in the news lately from the world of science. I thought it would be a good idea to present a few of the stories behind the stories. Thank Goddess you have this blog to help you get to The Truth.

If you dream it, you will sea it
Spiritual and financial advisor
Chellie Campbell, founder of the Dolphin Club, continues to claim that there are only three kinds of fish in the sea: Dolphins, Sharks, and Tuna. How is it, then, that scientists are discovering more species of marine life every day, especially in the deep seas? The latest sea census has allegedly uncovered a diverse range of critters – and not just strange "new" species of fish, but other extraordinary creatures such as hot-tubbing shrimp, giant lobsters, furry crabs, hairy clams, sea unicorns, and pygmy mermaids.

"We can’t find anyplace where we can’t find anything new," says Ron O’Dor, a senior scientist with the census.

How can this be? Dr. Dupert Mandrake, noted causality researcher and Miracles Coach, says it is just more proof that we create our own reality. "The scientists are creating these new species themselves, simply by desiring to discover them," says Dr. Mandrake. "These strange animals are the scientists' thought-forms come to life. As we learned in the hit science documentaries What The Bleep Do We Know? and The Secret, we not only create our reality, but we can manifest anything just by thinking about it."

Dr. Mandrake explains that every scientist wants to be the first to discover a new species or star or planet or medical breakthrough. They all want to have something named after them. If their desire is powerful and focused enough, the new species or star or whatever will actually be manifested. That's what's been happening undersea. "The marine biologists are working on particularly fertile ground, or, more accurately, in fertile waters, because the Ocean is the Mother of all life," Dr. Mandrake says. He himself has just spent a week creating several new species of sea sprites and coral fairies, merely by imagining them.

When asked about Chellie Campbell’s claim that there are only three kinds of fish in the sea – or, for that matter, her continued insistence that dolphins are fish – he says, "That is absolutely true, in Chellie’s reality. This reality works for her and for members of her Dolphin Club, just as the sea-census takers’ reality works for them and for those who choose to believe their stories about furry crabs and such. I don’t think we should be judgmental."

The tracks of his tears
For a few years now, astronomers and other science geeks have been going on and on about the possibility of water on Mars. They keep finding "new" evidence that
there may have been water on the surface or below the surface of the Red Planet.

"Well, of course there’s water on Mars," says intuitive cosmologist Dr. Randa Maxx. She even knows the reason; her research has uncovered evidence that the Face On Mars is weeping because of the terrible things humans are doing to the Earth and to each other. "It’s the very same reason that Mary, Mother of God, has been making Her statues weep, and causing statues of Her son to bleed," explains Dr. Maxx. "The dramatic increase in statue miracles on this planet is but a pale reflection of the miracles occurring elsewhere in the solar system and galaxy."

Some scientists have pooh-poohed the notion of the Face On Mars, pointing to "clearer" more recent photographs of the area that most seekers of truth know to be The Face. Dr. Maxx scoffs at these. "Everybody who’s bothered to do any research at all knows those photos were faked," she says "The truth is that there is a Face, and it is weeping, and now its nose is running too. In addition, the entire planet is sweating because it is worried about the events that are now transpiring. This explains the reasons for the water appearing in other spots besides the Face. There is still time for the Lightworkers to turn things around, but Mars isn't very optimistic. And I believe the Red Planet's weeping and sweating will continue until the next major galactic shift is complete and we all become omnidimensional beings."

Dust to dust
Comet dust is making a big splash in the headlines now. According to some scientists, the dust of comets is revealing intriguing new possibilities about the origins of our Solar System and the birth of life on Earth. This comet dust was supposedly scattered around the Solar System eons ago, and it created life wherever it landed.

Since the dust is so powerful, it is, of course, going to be harvested and marketed here on Earth, to aid those who can afford it in their manifestation efforts. However, at an expected $250,000.00 USD per ounce, it will be beyond the budget of the average manifester.

What scientists are not telling you, because, obviously, they don’t want you to know, is that an even more powerful dust is widely available now for only $9.99 USD. A woman on Maui who goes by the name Miss Bootzie sells gold dust blessed by Lakshmi, the goddess of wealth and good fortune. Sprinkle some of this dust in your pocket, wallet, or purse, and watch your money grow!

From the far reaches of the galaxy to the swirling depths of Mother Ocean, it’s a wonderful Universe we live in. It is, in fact, a much more wondrous place than stuffy old science generally makes it out to be. Thank goodness, then, that we have cutting-edge researchers and reporters to help us find the greater truth behind the mundane hash that science is always slinging our way.

The title of today’s post was inspired by my fave songwriter Leonard Cohen and his famous "God Is Alive, Magic Is Afoot" poem (originally appearing in his novel, Beautiful Losers).

I made up Dupert Mandrake and Randa Maxx and their quotations. But Chellie Campbell and that woman on Maui who sells the gold dust are real.

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