Showing posts with label Mony Vital. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Mony Vital. Show all posts

Saturday, January 26, 2013

Vital signs: "Immortal" (former) breatharian Mony Vital dies on GIN cruise


Attention New Evaluations
There is going to be a short delay for returning phone calls for recent requests for evaluations. Energetic Balancing appreciates your patience.
~ From the Energetic Balancing site of the...um...late immortal, Mony Vital


Well, yes... hmm... there is probably going to be quite a long delay now. Mony Vital, self-professed immortal, has apparently shuffled off of this mortal coil after all. There's buzz on Facebook about it at the moment, and I'm sure the news will reach the larger world soon.

Maybe it's some kind of cosmic joke. Maybe it's a Sign from the Universe that lifelong scammer Kevin Trudeau's Ponzi-like Global Information Network (GIN) is moribund. But Mony Vital, who was one of the featured hustlers on the GIN Leadership Cruise, apparently died in his sleep on the ship.

Moment of silence... Okay, that's enough.

I feel bad for his family and friends and the people who loved him, but compelled to point out a few painfully obvious things.

Mony Vital claimed to be immortal. He also taught that everyone is immortal, if he or she will only stop believing in "the culture of death." He has also reportedly claimed to be the oldest man alive (though several ex-GIN members who knew him put him in his mid to late 50s at time of death).

Mony Vital on 2013 GIN cruise,
presumably lecturing about immortality.
Click on pic to enlarge.

And Mony had claimed at various times to be a breatharian, existing mainly on air and light, and rarely taking in food or water at all. (See first comment below for clarification about his dietary habits.) Some sources say he was a breatharian for a mere 18 months; some say he claimed he'd been one for five years. Who knows what to believe? He looked pretty skinny at the end of his life -- either like a person on a severely calorie-restricted diet, or a cancer patient. Not the kind of person you'd necessarily want to be paying to give you health advice.

Most significantly, Mony made a living "balancing the energies" of people, animals, plants, and buildings. The deal was that each person, animal, plant or building had to pay his, or or its own annual or "lifetime" membership fee. There was a special offer on "Vital Energetic Balancing" for GIN members only.

*Each individual Person, Child, Animal, Plant, House and Office must have their own application and all have an equal fees.
Individuals: 1 year = $550. Lifetime = $2700. (Saving of $50 for the year and $175 on the Lifetime for each individual application).
*For Animal, Plant, House and Office you will receive an identification number of 15 digits on stickers (10 stickers) to attach to the surrounding local space. Please call us before you apply. [toll-free number]
payment plan information, or if you feel urgency to apply, or for long evaluation, call Mony for an interview [toll-free number]
Evaluations:
**Regular (Periodic Evaluation) are free every 3 months.
*Energetic Evaluation and sound only $35.00 can be obtained every 15 days. Request by email or phone. payments at the time of the evaluation.
*Energetic Evaluation and sound with review $450.00
*Members – Energetic Evaluation and sound with review $300.
1Year=$550.,
Lifetime=$2700.
Upgrade to lifetime=$2075.00
Evaluation + Sound (no review)=$35.
Evaluation + Sound (with review)=$450.
Evaluation + Sound (with review) for members=$300.

Actually, it looks like a real bargain; maybe he can continue doing it from The Other Side. As of now, Mony's frauducts and flopportunities are still listed in the GIN Store.

As for the cause of death, I haven't heard yet. Maybe he just breathed some bad air. People are always getting sick on cruises after eating bad food, after all. Or maybe he drained his body of "vital energies" one too many times.

I am sure that once the news of his death becomes widely known there will be many fans and supporters who will say he chose to die... or to transition, or translate, or move into the Vortex, or whichever New-Wage/McSpirituality euphemism they prefer. [See PPPS below. ~ CC]

Unless it's all a publicity stunt, with the plan for Kevin Trudeau to miraculously bring Mony back from the dead -- using techniques that will only be revealed when you get to Level Seven in GIN.

PS ~ Here's a pretty snarky 2008 article on Mony from the Las Vegas Sun. http://www.lasvegassun.com/news/2008/mar/24/immortality-sale/

PPS added on January 28, 2013 ~ Not surprisingly, Not-Doctor Lenny Coldwell has weighed in on Mony Vital's death in his usual semi-literate manner. (Lenny snarked about Jerry Hicks' death too, but months after the fact, since at the time Jerry croaked (that's the Hicks' preferred term), Lenny was still in GIN, and the Hicks are on GIN's reading list.)


PPPS added on February 6, 2013 ~  I originally wrote and published this post within hours of hearing about Mony's death -- and that was within hours of its occurrence. At the time, it was still just some buzz on a few pages on Facebook, and the world at large had not yet heard the news. As it turned out, though, my prediction was correct regarding some people's rationalization that Mony "chose" to depart this existence. (I can't take too much credit for my foresight: it wasn't at all hard to predict, since the "s/he chose to leave" is the tale that that the fans of countless New-Wage and McSpirituality hucksters, as well as the followers of more traditional religious leaders and gurus, have used for many, many years.) Anyway, on Mony's web site -- the one from which I quoted at the very beginning of this post -- we are now informed:
To all of our valued and cherished Vital Energetic Balancing members and future members, we would like to inform you that Dr. Mony Vital made a choice to leave this existence for a higher calling. We have full intention of resuming VEB standard operations as soon as possible. Thank you for your patience and please stay tuned.
Uh-huh... So we are expected to believe that Mony chose to leave this existence while he was on a cruise where his job was to preach about immortality, and to sell all kinds of frauducts and flopportunities related to "ageless living," and to plant the seeds for future sales. That is pretty lousy marketing, if you ask me. As my new pal Doc Bunkum wrote to me:
Wonder what his higher calling is anyhow?

Selling immortality in heaven?

I realize we should exercise a certain degree of decorum in this matter, as there's probably a family grieving somewhere, but this is serious funny stuff! 
More bloggers snark (and snark about snarking):

Related on this Whirled: Give us your gold and never grow old (February 2011)


More True-dough (and Lenny) on this Whirled:

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