The Whirled turns 15 today

 

We haven't had a Quinceañera (fifteenth birthday) celebration on this Whirled in years. The previous gala, in June of 2013, celebrated the fifteenth anniversary of the former Bernd Klein of the Republic of Germany getting his new name, Leonard Coldwell. So actually... it was a Quinceañera for a name, which not only is terribly silly but, I'll acknowledge, is probably also a grievous example of cultural appropriation, for which I hope I may be forgiven. By any name, Bernd/Lenny is one of the stupidest and most evil men that most of the world has never heard of (a man so unimportant that even a blogger whose blog was totally dedicated to his stupidity and evil got bored with him several years ago)... but I digress.

With the current Whirled celebration, I am committing yet another act of cultural appropriation, but for what I think is a much better cause: to commemorate the fifteenth birthday of Whirled Musings, which was launched on July 27, 2006. I've marked the anniversary every year here, sometimes with a brief mention and other times a more extended rumination about the history and purpose of this endeavor. Regarding said history and purpose, I've said pretty much everything that I think needs to be said, and don't feel compelled to say it all again, but for anyone who's curious, this page 'splains it all.

Being nothing if not redundant, though, I'll repeat a Quinceañera-related anecdote that I published on my June 2013 post, and on Facebook, and probably on other posts here as well. So here we go again.

The Quinceañera -- pronounced KEEN-say-ahn-YEH-ra -- is a lovely tradition, usually held for girls on their fifteenth birthday. It's kind of like a Sweet Sixteen party, but a year early. Marking a young girl's passage into womanhood, it is a time when the honoree is truly a princess-for-a-day. Done properly, a Quinceañera is nearly as elaborate (and expensive) as a wedding, and some girls do choose a white wedding-ish gown for their special day.

In fact, a few months ago at my favorite country auction, there was a Quinceañera doll on the block. More than likely she was intended as a table centerpiece for a Quinceañera party. (Yes, I know I've told this story before on Facebook and possibly here as well, but I'm afraid you'll have to hear it again.) At first I thought the little figure to be a bride doll, because she was decked in a gorgeous white gown. But then I looked at the sash the doll was wearing, which read, "Mis Quince Años." (Mis Quince años (pr. MEES KEEN-say AHN-yos) literally translates to "My Fifteen Years," and is of course a reference to one's fifteenth birthday.)

I thought nothing more about it till much later on when, half asleep, I heard the twangy, Texas-accented voice of the obviously Spanish-impaired auction floor assistant holler out:

"Miss Quint's anus!"

Startled into full wakefulness, I looked up and saw that he was holding the Mis Quince Años doll high up in the air. There were a few shocked faces in the audience; no one who was paying attention knew quite what to make of it. But others, like me, were trying heroically to suppress their mirth. Said the dapper British auctioneer, who was clearly trying to stifle his laughter, "Um, what was that again?"

"Miss Quint's anus!"

A few in the audience tittered. Confused, the poor floor guy said, "Hey, don't blame me. That's what it says on the doll's ribbon!"

Once the confusion was cleared up, the proceedings continued, but alas, there were no buyers for Miss Quint or her anus. I kind of felt sorry for both of them.

That certainly wasn't the first and won't be the last time I write about assholes on this blog, of course.

I want to thank my three or four regular readers for your continued reading over the years, even when I got redundant and obsessive and boring, which is probably more often than even I am willing to admit. I especially want to thank everyone who posted comments over the years, even the ones blasting me for any number of [imaginary] sins. I most especially want to thank those of you who have made monetary donations to this blog. They're always appreciated, even more so now. If you'd like to help Whirled Musings celebrate its fifteenth birthday, here's a handy link to do just that. Whether you donate or not, thank you for visiting.