In a stunning development in an already controversial US presidential campaign, Republican front-runner Donald J. Trump has named infomercial king Kevin Trudeau as his running mate. Although currently serving a 10-year sentence in a Federal prison in Alabama for criminal contempt related to infomercials for one of his diet books, that's no impediment, says Mr. Trump, who added that the Donald J. Trump Foundation has made a "substantial" donation to Mr. Trudeau's legal defense fund.
Said Mr. Trump, "I've given careful consideration to this matter and after talking to and vetting many, many people, I have decided that I needed another 'outsider' rather than a career politician by my side. Kevin is definitely an outsider; the establishment hates him. And he and I have a lot in common. He is one of the most successful businessmen in modern history, and he has terrific taste in foreign wives. He can pick a '10' every time.
"And like me, Kevin has been fighting the establishment and telling truths that those in power just don't want to hear. They don't wanna hear any of it, I tell you. They're running scared now. And Kevin, he got put in jail for telling the truth, and that never should have happened."
When asked how a convicted felon could become V.P., Mr. Trump scoffed. "There's nothing in the Constitution that says a convicted felon can't be president or vice president."
He added that the point might become moot anyway. "Kevin lost his appeal last month but we're taking the case to the Supreme Court. We're going to get his conviction reversed, we're going to get that $40 million civil fine vacated, and we're going to make sure that the government compensates Kevin for all of the time and money they've taken from him. And we're gonna get that 1990s fraud conviction reversed too; he never should have been in jail for that either.
"And then we're gonna change the criminal contempt laws, and throw out the Federal Trade Commission if we need to, so that something like this travesty of justice will never happen again.
"The bottom line is that Kevin Trudeau is a great, great American. He's gonna help me re-open Trump University, and along with our mutual friend Troy McClain -- he was on The Apprentice and he's running that GIN club now, and there is definitely a position for him in my cabinet --- together we are going to make America great again."
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I have other Matters of Consequence to deal with now, but will have more about this tomorrow.
~CC
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Is This part of the Twelve Vision Party agenda.
ReplyDeleteNo, it's part of the Cosmic Connie satire agenda.
ReplyDeleteSometimes satire and sarcasm serve as prophecy. There's a factual link with Ukraine, the Putin-Trump wing (their tea party). And to this day, sleazeball Kevin Trudeau is using his Facebook page to kiss Donnie's illegitimate presidency for a PP (P. Pardon).
ReplyDeleteTruth stranger than fiction. Why is Facebook even available to prisoners, anywhere?!!
Well Trump has already responded to consider actually pardoning this trash, Kevin Trudeau. So satire and sarcasm near the orange odor may be closer to prophecy. Mueller dragging feet much longer means the satire becomes 'true'.
ReplyDeleteCriminals are 'The heroes' "Idiocracy" becoming more of a premonition 'documentary' each passing day as the orange gas spreads.
Thanks for writing, Mason. Yep, even though this particular post, written in March 2016, was satire (I followed up the next day with a real post about the similarities between Trump and Trudeau), I've blogged several times since then about the real-life, NOT-satirical attempts by Trudeau and some of his buddies and followers to kiss up to Herr Drumpf and persuade the latter to free and pardon Kevin. This October 2017 post is one of the most recent entries, and it has links to previous posts I wrote about the #FreeKevinTrudeau "movement's" appeals to the Trump White House.
ReplyDeletehttp://cosmicconnie.blogspot.com/2017/10/freekevintrudeau-sucks-up-to-sheriff-joe.html
I'm not sure what you meant by Trump responding with indications that he is actually considering pardoning Trudeau. The last I heard (or, rather, read), some of the FreeKevin folks were crowing because they had FINALLY gotten a response from the White House after months of hounding via email, social media, snail-mail letters, phone calls, etc. But it was apparently just a form letter acknowledging someone's communication. I doubt if Trump even saw it or is even marginally aware of Kevin's "ordeal." However, if you have some newer info, please do share! I probably need to do an update on the #FreeKevin movement anyway.
Finally, and in answer to your possibly rhetorical question in your first comment, I don't believe that Trudeau has direct access to social media. But he does keep in touch with the outside world through some of his close buddies, who write on his own Facebook page for him. And the #FreeKevinTrudeau Facebook page is maintained by someone else, apparently a misguided fan and Kevin wannabe.